Wasurenai yo: I won't forget
by priscel
Summary: AU, EW Spoiler. They made the sacrifices so others wouldn't have to, but the pilots were not prepared for the pain when Barton's last ace took away their smile. Eventual 1x2, 3x4.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimers: I garner no profit from this fic. I own nothing but the clothes on my back and Bobo, if the g-boys were mine, I'd be in heaven.

Warnings: Angst, spoilers - Endless waltz alternate end- so AU, Mecha-ish, Shounen ai, character death?

Pairings: 1+2, 1+R, 3+4, 5xS, eventual 1x2, 3x4

AN: Editing frenzy

Wasurenai yo (I won't forget)

by priscel

one

The pilots struggled to blunt the blows to and from their Gundams and protect the lives of the men under Barton's thumb, though the mobile suit pilots made it clear they were ready to kill them. Their ammunition was running low and they all knew that their chances of getting out this situation and one of them making it to save Relena were getting slimmer by the moment as they took on more heavy fire.

The pilots tried to think of another plan of attack when Trowa's guns clicked empty. Everything went into slow motion when another Gundam was detected over the Barton shelter. Duo smiled, recognizing the unidentified Gundam as Wing. He unconsciously breathed a sigh of relief as he felt the taut muscles in his back slowly relax. They were suddenly rocked violently in their suits as the shockwave from the blast hit them.

Once the shimmer began to fade, Quatre's image popped up in a small square on their screens. They waited as the clicking of the keys on Quatre's console sounded loud in the thick silence of their cockpits. Quatre's soft voice roused them out of their semi-trance like states and informed them of what they were sure the Bartons knew as well.

"The shield's integrity is at 70... 68 percent and dropping."

"That's my partner." Duo proclaimed proudly with a heavy feeling over his chest as he watched Wing pause then fire the second shot. The pressure increased, making him feel uneasy. He punched up the image of Wing as he mentally computed that Heero was firing at maximum strength in 30 second intervals. His mouth went dry as he took in the state of Heero's Gundam- Wing was falling apart. Seconds later, he watched as Wing was bombarded with shell fire and was unable to fire back. Duo yelled over the com. He didn't know what he had said, but it got the other pilots' attention. They saw more mobile suits coming out of the shelter and immediately open fire on their fellow pilot. They watched in disbelief as Wing lost its arm.

"We got to help him!" Duo's fingers were already working on his console, re-routing auxiliary systems and the power from his cloak to give his beam scythe the extra boost it needed. He punched angrily at the console, moving panels to rewire his Gundam. A grim smile settled over his face as he watched his power levels fluctuate, 'If the beam scythe burns out, I'll bring those suits down with my buddy's bare hands if I have to.'

"With what Duo! We have nothing left." Quatre stressed trying to reach him.

"I don't know, but I'm not going to stand here and watch them kill him!" Duo kicked the side of the console and Scythe's power level shot up to 76 percent. He grinned, nothing like the old mechanic's boot to get things jump-started.

Quatre's eyes widen at the thought that Duo intended to kill the MS pilots. "You can't, Duo."

"I know that Quat. I won't kill the bastards, but I wish someone could tell them to be thankful that death doesn't want their hides today." With that said, he fired his boosters and thrust his Gundam through the indecisive suits that stood around him, swiping up one of their Gattling guns and shooting.

"Duo!" Quatre called again.

"You better pray to whateva God you believe in when Death comes knocking!" Quatre groaned in relief after hearing Duo's maniacal laughter over the com, even though his empathy told him that Duo wasn't going in with suicide in mind.

Quatre shared a long quiet moment with Trowa, looking over the face of his friend who gave him a small smile and a nod. Using his last shotel, Quatre struck down the suits near him with two swift debilitating blows. He took up one of their beam cannons and fought to catch up to Duo. Trowa stood before the rest of the suits ready to cover his comrades' backs, when Zechs came to his side.

The battle continued. They had been so busy trying to divert and disarm the mobile suits that they hadn't seen Heero fire the third shot until they heard Quatre's voice over the com.

"Heero!"

Four sequential gasps followed Quatre's cry, the amount of grief and horror inflected in Quatre's voice struck the pilots like a shotgun hit to the chest. All movement ceased as Wing Zero exploded outward; pieces shooting in smoking streaks toward the ground, their crash sites hidden by the explosion from the Barton shelter. No one noticed, through the smoke and heated air, as a lone battered and bruised figure tumbled out of his still smoking cockpit.

oooOoooOoooOooo

Inside the crumbling Barton shelter, the high-strung aristocrat was draped over a control panel. His hands worked, as his subordinates ducked for cover from the falling concrete and the spark of live wire. A manic gleam filled his beady eyes, his body jerked when a body fell into him after being struck by a chunk of ceiling, with a grunt he pushed it to the floor. His eye twitched as he typed and soon the line of his lips became non-existent as he smiled at the decreasing numbers on the screen.

'And Zechs thought he stopped my back up plan,' he thought scoffing at how Zechs had destroy MO-3. He'd succeed one way or another in having the Barton name back where it rightfully belonged. He gripped the panel, his head spinning when he realized that his dead subordinate hadn't completely blocked him from that fallen piece of ceiling earlier as he wiped away the small trickle of blood from the side of his head.

"Good for nothing," he muttered darkly while cradling his head with one hand when one of his men shouted about another Gundams' arrival.

He gripped the remote to stop the count down as he ran up to the large view screen and stared in disbelief. He was losing and his soldiers refused to move on the civilians surrounding them. This was not how he imagined it. His family were the true sovereign rulers of this world, he reached out and called to Mariemaia.

Relena stood her ground against Dekim and everything happen faster than she thought possible: Dekim was firing at her, she was pushed and now holding a bleeding Mariemaia. She cursed herself for being stupid and letting the little girl push her out of the line of fire. She buried her face in baby-soft, reddish bourbon colored hair when she jerked at the second shot going off. She looked up in time to see a stream of blood flying from Dekim's head as he fell. Then Heero was there, her heart fluttered when his gun clicked empty and Mariemaia became a heavy weight in her arms. She gasped out his name, already up and moving toward him, when she saw him falling.

Commander Une caught Mariemaia, sending a glare at Relena before she shouted for the doctor. Her ear twitched when one Barton's men made a panicked sound as he tried to bring back up the satellite sensors.

"God." He mumbled but it was loud in the silent room.

"What is it?" Une laid Mariemaia gently on the Doctor's lap and went over to the only seated person in the room. She walked over and saw the screen over the man's shoulder reading 'access denied'. Her eyes widen at the decreasing numbers and the rapidly falling, large blip on the screen. She stared at the still body of Dekim, the line of her mouth firmed. She squeezed the man's shoulder, stopping his frantic efforts and bringing his attention to her. "Patch me through to this frequency."

oooOoooOoooOooo

Quatre's smiling image sent a wave of relief through the pilots. Duo and others knew that because of his space heart, Quatre wouldn't be able to hide it if Heero was dead. Yet, their reprieve was short lived when Commander Une appeared on all their screens.

"You don't see it yet but you should ..." suddenly all their sensors beeped as she continued, "We thought that we had stopped Dekim's plan to drop colony x-18999 on Earth but it seems he set up remote access to the colony from this shelter."

"Get to the point, Lady." Zechs' skepticism plain in his voice as he ignored the icy look Une sent his way.

"As we speak, we have 15 minutes before a square mile chunk of colony enters the Earth's atmosphere and its impact plunges us into unending darkness." She said it so solemnly that Duo wondered what had changed the Lady so much for her to be the complete opposite of the bun wearing, megalomaniac they had dealt with during the war.

"Yea then we have what? Five minutes, if we can't slow it down enough to save Mother nature from causing her own demise via gravity."

Une nodded, the braided pilot sounded flippant but that tone didn't reach his eyes. She couldn't help the slight twist in the corner of her mouth at the braided pilot's way of saying things. "We need a plan and fast. Damages?"

Both Quatre and Trowa shook their heads, their Gundams were out of fire power and too damaged to be of much use.

"From its trajectory, there's no way we would be able to intercept it before it breaks Earth's atmosphere." Quatre said dismally, the defeated sound was strange coming from the usually upbeat blond.

"Then we have to do it as it falls." Wu Fei broke in, ignoring the murmur of disbelief in the room and smiling inside as glimpsed the contemplative expression on his braided comrade's face. The Commander silenced the commotion around her with one look, while Wu Fei assessed his damages. He could hold and fire his beam cannons in two constant pulses for a maximum of one minute before they needed to recharge and in that time he wouldn't be able to get all the pieces from his initial blasts, he told them this. Those pieces could still level cities, and it was a risk they were willing to take.

"I'm the fastest, I should be able to slice up those pieces while you continue to concentrate on the larger ones. Quat let us know if its acceleration fluctuates." Quatre nodded to Duo, catching onto the possibility that the chunk had a guidance system with maneuverability. If that was so, then they would really be in trouble.

"Good, I'll send up the fastest Serpents."

"I don't know about that Lady. There are probably Barton loyalists who'd love to take out one of us if you give them the chance."

Commander Une, shook her head knowingly at his use of her familiar title and gave Duo a small smile. "Yes that's one of the dangers involved but we need those extra guns."

There was no time for argument, and he knew that they'd be lucky if they'd make it before the chunk breached the surface. He swallowed his uneasiness with a nod, "Fine. Send what you got." With that Duo and Wu Fei took off.

"Don't worry, Duo and Wu Fei, we've got you covered." Sally's smiling voice came over the com when they detected her, Noin and Zechs moving in on their position with six unfriendlies behind them.

"Onna, what are you doing here?"

"Now, I can't let you guys have all the glory!" She laughed and winked at Duo over the com. "Nor the fame from the daredevil impossibility of it." Wu Fei snorted with a small upward twist of his lips. She smirked and gunned the boosters of the Serpent she flew to nudge Wu Fei before he could make his retort.

"Onna!"

"We specialize in the impossible, y'know." Duo laughed, shutting off the emergency light that told him that one of his flight servos was overheating. "Well, they say luck is a lady, so Sally rub off some of that luck on us will ya?"

She laughed. "Working on it!"

"This is not the time for this nonsense. Onna you're becoming as bad as Maxwell." Wu Fei grumbled as he was jostled in his Gundam again.

"Thanks for the compliment Woofers!" He gave Duo a mock Yuy glare before he sighed in defeat. The banter and antics from the two were not slowing their ascent or taking them off course and he took it for what it was, a relief from the very real possibility that none of them would be able to stop the second attempt to bring Earth up in flames and the countless lives it would take. He shook his head, 'all set into motion to glorify the Barton name.' He berated himself for his ill-made choice earlier on.

Two minutes left from the predicted time, they stopped at 200 km above the Earth's surface and decided this would give them a little space to work with since they knew they couldn't take out the whole thing on the first couple of tries. Duo tramped down on his discomfort from having six unfriendlies at their backs and noticed the sweat that dripped down his face. He checked his air; he forgot he had re-routed the power to that system as well.

"Maxwell?" Wu Fei queried, noticing his friends' sweating face.

Duo smiled at Wu Fei, re-routing power to his life support as he began to breathe easier. "S'ok, Fei. Just needed to check my power levels." It wasn't a lie, not really.

Wu Fei narrowed his eyes at the braided pilot but Duo was saved from further questioning when their proximity alarms went off and Quatre's voice was heard over the com giving the status of chunk's position. Wu Fei powered up his guns and Duo distanced himself, as did the others, to various points around Wu Fei.

Wu Fei began firing, slowing the chunk's descent with the force of the blasts. The moment Wu Fei cut his cannons to recharge them, the Serpents fired their canons and waited anxiously for Wu Fei's next shot, blasting off pieces that Duo and Zechs sliced up if they were too large. Wu Fei fired again, all the suits clearing the blast range. It went on like this for several minutes, which seemed like an eternity to the pilots. They all jerked when one of the Serpent pilots suddenly laughed madly then shut off his com link.

"Spencer?" Zechs called, moving to the position the pilot abandon and blasting through the chunk the pilot ignored. They didn't have time for this, the chunk was now half its original size, it decelerated and it looked like they were going to make it. He turned to intercept Spencer but he was too late. The pilot had fired his boosters and rammed into Wu Fei's Gundam.

"'Fei!" Duo shouted, jerking out of the way when the beam nearly hit him. He saw Wu Fei jostled in his cockpit and then his external cams should the reason why, there was a Serpent clinging to him.

"No Duo." Wu Fei yelled when he saw his braided friend make a move in his direction. He wouldn't have them abandon their posts for something he could handle on his own.

Duo nodded and cursed when the chunk split in two, Quatre's voice inaudible to him as he watched the heavier portion increase in its acceleration and angle in a tangent to its original trajectory. The other piece seemed to jerk back up as if caught in an updraft. He spared one final glimpse at Wu Fei to see Sally and Zechs coming to his aid, despite his friend's protests that he could handle it, before he went after the chunk.

He cursed at his luck when his Scythe flickered out. He realized the power level in his beam scythe was far to low, even if he re-routed his life support, to do any damage to the renegade piece. He flew in front of it and braced his Gundams' feet against it and fired his thrusters in reverse. He grimaced when his Gundam groaned under the stress but the haul beneath its feet held against the pressure.

"Hang in there, buddy," he mumbled distractedly, nodding when the descent slowed and rubbing away the nose bleed from the speed. He knew that if he kept this up for much longer, it would burn out his only means to stay airborne. He thought about the self-detonation device (SDD) again. His eyes flitted over his heat sensors with another curse when the renegade piece began to break apart. His eyes widen when he realized it wasn't from the force of the fall or the strain of his Gundam against the haul. He brought up several images of it and his eyes ran over it as he gasped. It wasn't randomly falling apart like meteors would in Earth's atmosphere, but separating sectionally, into pieces large enough to destroy areas the size of Rhode Island. It was programmed.

"Wu Fei! It's program-"

"Maxwell you're getting too cl-"

Duo punched his console, the damned thing was sending out a dampening field. He thought about the SDD, his mind already working up the probability of it being a usable power source. It was powerful enough to destroy a Gundam, then it would work. He winced as he moved a three-inch thick, reinforced gundanium panel behind his seat and then another panel, wincing when the edge of the panel cut into his hands. He ignored the pain, working the calibrations mentally and mouthing the end result unconsciously as he dug through auxiliary wiring and re-routed power lines into the SDD lines that ran deep beneath his seat. His cut hands shook with effort as he connected the final power relay to the flat panels in Deathscythe's right hand that served as a point of recharge for the beam scythe. He knew it would ruin Deathscythe's power conduits by the time this was all over but it didn't matter.

He hoped they wouldn't need the Gundams after this.

The minutes of precious time it took him to make all the adjustments was rewarded. He pulled on his trademark grin when the beam scythe flared and pulsed ever 20 seconds with energy. He scanned the chunk and stabbed scythe down into the left side of it. The chunk stopped separating and small explosions shook the mass as it jerked upward like a puppet on strings.

"...Maxw...read?..."

"Negative... visual..."

"Goddamn it, Duo! Answer me!"

Duo whooped. "The mouth on you 'Fei! Remind me to tell Sally to give you a little more nookie in the morning."

"Maxwell!"

Duo snickered, he could hear the blush in Wu Fei's voice. "'Fei they were programmed to fall to pieces and I think I just destroyed the internal computer since I'm able to transmit now." The smile never left his face or his voice though the strain could clearly be heard.

"Hn, Quatre told us."

"'Fei, there are too many pieces, I'll take with me as many as I can."

"What! Maxwell!" Wu Fei yelled at the image of his friend, as his eyes widen at the red lights that continued to flash across Duo's face. His hard-pressed lips were the only indication of his inner turmoil while he kept a straight face.

He bowed to his friend in acceptance and gratitude; he was doing an honourable thing. "XieXie" (1).

"Duo, NO! We'll work at aiding the crash site victims." Quatre argued.

"Winner!" Wu Fei glared at Quatre's stressed image, he was usually able to keep it together better than this.

"'Fei." He needed to talk to his little brother. Duo smiled, letting the grin drop and along with it his mask, he looked so tired. "Quat, I have to destroy this chunk at least. It's the largest piece and I don't have enough power."

Quatre's bottom lip quivered on screen, he didn't care if he was being selfish. They had come through it all together and they deserved to live like everyone else. "B-But one of the Serpents can lend you a cannon... Sally's four minutes away. Or Wu Fei can blast it-"

"Not enough time and not from this range the blast wouldn't do jack shit but add to the problems." Duo sighed and stopped a cough that left a metallic tang in his mouth. "Quat, I have to do this. If it saves one city then what's one life compared to thousands." Duo withdrew his beam scythe and flew down to the bottom of the deteriorating chunk, matching its descent. He sighed again, his eyes darting away from the stricken aquamarines set on his face. Gods did it hurt to hear Quatre in such pain for him. He steeled himself for more dissuading words from his blond friend.

"Duo." Duo stared in surprise at Trowa who nodded to him with Quatre snug against his side.

"Semper fi." Duo said proudly with a sad smile before he spoke again, "See you soon, I doubt Hell will want me to stay too long with my buddy 'Scythe taking up all the space." The last image they saw from him was his devil-may-care grin before he cut his coms. He turned up his battle music, clicking through the tracks and stopping when he heard:

_You hide and choke on all the issues of your time..._

_You'll never save the world if all you do is whine..._

Duo cocked his head to the side and smiled a face splitting grin as he blared the music in his cockpit on the chorus opening line, _So I say hell yeah!_ (2) It was what he needed, the vibrations of the music alone helped him ignore the pain of flying at an untried speed for him and the pressure... He took labored breaths as he checked to make sure that his beam scythe was indeed at full power, as he flew toward the chunk.

The other pilots, who were chasing and blasting at the chunks, felt the explosion before they saw it. Surreal green flames erupted all around the chunk to their far left before it blew to pieces. At the same time inside the Barton shelter, Quatre collapsed with a strangled cry and a few feet away, a half-conscious Heero found his voice. He had heard everything from his position in Relena's arms as he weakly reached out...

"Duo."

tbc...

* * *

(1) Mandarin Chinese for 'thank you'. 

(2) 'Rock & Roll Revolution' by Saliva


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimers: I garner no profit from this fic. I own nothing but the clothes on my back and Bobo, if the g-boys were mine, I'd be one happy person.

Warnings: Angst, spoilers in first part- Endless waltz alternate end- so AU, Shounen ai, character death?

Pairings: 1+2, 1+R, 3+4, 5xS, eventual 1x2, 3x4

AN: Editing frenzy

Wasurenai yo

by priscel

two

"Fuck." The strained, raspy sounding word almost echoed in the thick, heated darkness. He could not remember where he was or who, for that matter. All he knew was instinct based and it declared he must free himself but the pain that shot through his chest, as he weakly pulled at his harness, stopped him.

'hold on...' He heard a whisper somewhere but it was too late for it to matter; the cold numbness in his fingers and legs was spreading past his no longer aching stomach. He knew that it was a bad sign and on top of that, the heat of the cockpit only made him shiver like he was cold.

'Cockpit?' A wave of dizziness hit him and he dropped his head forward until it passed. He heard again that whisper, but it was fuller, cocky and familiar as it remarked that someone had lit a fire under his ass and that was why it was so hot. He felt like he would have laughed if his throat didn't feel like it had needles in it. Then the blurry things around him began to fade. Don't ask him how he knew that, he could barely see anything from where he was hanging.

He struggled to lift his head and tried to force his eyes to focus on the blinking, blurry screens in front of him. There were words on one of them, words that disappeared and changed but what was the use in straining himself when he couldn't even read them. He realized what had woke him up; he felt small bursts of air against his face they were cooler than the metallic air in the cockpit, but soon the air stopped and a live wire smell joined the humid air he breathed.

'. . . no. . .'

He felt oddly calmed by that dying whisper for familiarity and the thrum of his slow heart beat in his ears. '...come.' The numbness beckoned to him and soon he slipped away as the release light flashed and the hiss of metal decompressing covered the shocked gasps on the other side.

oooOoooOoooOooo

The cream-colored door opened to an orange sunlit room. Flip-flop slippered feet stepped into the room leaving the door ajar and then went over to the bed of the room's sole occupant. He checked his watch, he was a bit earlier but he felt that someone should be here for the boy if he needed anything. He snorted to himself, it was a breathy quiet sound compared to the boys heavy breathing, as he sat down in the chair beside the bed. He stared out the window to the fading light and setting sun, it wasn't like he'd be waking anytime soon. The doctor had said that he was unconscious which really wasn't anything new, anyone could tell that by looking - comatose was a better way of describing it. But still it was the principle of the matter, waking up to an empty room didn't agree with him. He was glad he wasn't the only one, three other people came to visit the boy, not including the kooky doctor, though Cedric was mainly the one who checked, cleaned and redressed all the wounds the boy bore.

He leaned back and smiled. It had been almost two weeks since Tamara had shown them her _alien_ and he was getting better.

oooOoooOoooOooo

"Cedric, tell me why are we out here again?"

"To see if there's anyone inside it."

"Yea!" A small girl piped up while bouncing up and down, her shoulder-length, dark-brown pig tails swinging around her heart-shaped face. She smiled, showing all her teeth before turning to hop in circles around the older, glaring girl who spoke before. "And I found it! Well, Emy said I could have it since we both found the treasure and anything else that we find that's buried. So that means I get to keep the alien inside."

The glaring girl snorted. "Tamara, you dummy, that's not buried treasure. Stuff like that is usually in a trunk and in the ground."

"It is so, in the ground."

"Nope, that right there is the crater it made when it fell. If you can see real dirt beneath the sand that means it must have hit the ground really hard to dig that deep."

Tamara's face scrunched up as she listened to Maggie then a brilliant smile lit her face. "Then it is buried treasure 'cos it's in the dirt! Emy said that's why we have to dig so deep."

Maggie gave a long-suffering sigh, "Emy said this, Emy said that..." She mocked, eyeing the overall covered girl with an arched brow. "How do you know Emanuel's right? You guys weren't supposed to come out this far by yourself and he's only eight like you." She started to look to Cedric for support but considered against it, hearing snickering from the supposed adult with them.

"Nah uh!" She shook her head for emphasis. "Alice was showing us around."

"Yea, at Zabriskie Point not all the way near the Canyon." (1)

Tamara frowned into her pout. "Emy says he's 143 and he showed us a shortcut. And he's gonna show us how to catch liz-ards tomorrow."

Maggie rubbed the back of her neck, her frustration making a light blush show on her brown cheeks. Emanuel 'Emy' Harden was the youngest son of the Manager staying on property at the Furnace Creek Inn. The boy probably did know a short cut since he had been raised in Death Valley. "I'm not going to argue with you, I dunno why I'm bothering to even listen to you. You are so annoying and that," she pointed to the ruined, seven foot, oval black object before she continued, "has to be a mobile suit's cockpit. There's probably a dead body in there..." She smiled deviously, "or worst, a blown up dead body with lots of puss and guts everywhere."

"Ewww!" Tamara's petulance quickly faded.

"And if you touch it'll make you explode, only leaving puss and guts everywhere." She tried to keep her glare but Tamara's wide-eyed expression, only prompted her to snort and smile.

"Ewww!" Tamara repeated before giggling.

"Damn, what happen to little girls being grossed out about stuff like that?"

"Since when were you grossed out by it, Magdalene Wyly?"

Maggie glared at Cedric's amused face, only he called her by her full name and decided that she preferred it when he was silent and moody. At least then he called her Maggie without being smug about it. She huffed, "I'm different."

He arched a dusty brown brow at the brown skinned girl before letting his eyes return to their examination of the scorched outer shell and the mostly melted keypad beside the melted edges of the hatch. "Oh?"

She glared and wondered if he could feel the imagined hole she was burning into his black-haired head with her brown eyes. She sighed and then pushed him aside and pressed a bunch of buttons on the ruined keypad. "You are taking too long, let me handle this. It's probably broken anyways."

Blue amused eyes watched the 12-year-old tomboy as she continued to press the keys to no avail. Maggie opened her mouth to speak when the hatch hissed as internal clamps depressurized. They gasped in amazement, the stale air whiffling their hair and Tamara squealed in excitement.

"Its... not broken." She shrugged looking at her hand briefly before covering her noise at the smell.

Cedric's blues darken with a knowing look. Although Maggie was only joking with Tamara, he knew that it was a possibility that the pilot was dead, and the cockpit filled with gore. He cursed himself and wished he had locked his charge in her room. Yet he knew it would have made no difference, she would have followed him and little Tamara with her decapitated doll -he couldn't get her to throw it away no matter what he gave her- wouldn't be too far behind. He was thankful that Emanuel stayed at the Inn with his friend, Alice. They didn't need to see the left over from the Barton coop from a week ago. He shook his head, running one hand through his short fringe. A week ago, Los Angeles was teeming with life, not the desolate, death trap of lawlessness it had become since. Six days ago, he and Alice were both college students home for Christmas. But it was hotter than hell out; the temperature hitting an unusual 120 degrees for January with nearly zero humidity and at night the temperature dropped to extreme lows. The newscasters called it the closest to Global warming the world had ever been and all sorts of advisories were broadcast daily.

The heat made people desperate. There were fights all over the city for water, tying up the evacuation forces and the thinly spread Preventers with looting and the illegal sale of goods: material and human. There was enough of the city left for people to feud over despite the people who desperately needed the aid provided by the law enforcement among them. He and Alice had to depend on each other to survive, to keep moving and get to some place safe. They came across others driving through on school buses and some men clearing their path through with a construction crane and plough. They joined the ragtag group and acquired several cars before heading out to Furnace Creek through Death Valley, where they were welcomed with open arms.

He didn't know why he bothered. A cockpit this damaged, sitting in the constant hundred-degree weather they'd been having since the earthquakes and fires, made it seem highly unlikely that the pilot inside was still living. He already had his fill of dead bodies.

Tamara ran up to the cockpit and climb up with one leg inside before Maggie picked her up and backed away. Cedric nodded. Maggie, like many of the children who were either participating in extracurricular activities, waiting on their parents to pick them up or for any other variety of reasons that held them after school, was hauled down into the basements by the staff when the first tremors started. When it was over, they returned home to find what was left of their families: the major cities were ploughed through, the survivors began relocating. Even though she joked about it, she knew the smell that came from the cockpit all too well and didn't want to Tamara to see it.

"Come on, Tamaram, lets get the blankets and water Cedric brought for your new alien. It's going to be cold when he takes it out."

Tamara made a face, then kicked Maggie in the shin and took off for their car giggling.

"Shit!" Maggie hunched over her abused leg.

"Don't call me that. I'm not a Tangerine!" Tamara yelled, waving her headless doll through the air and nearly tripping over her own feet.

"You little brat! I didn't call you a tangerine. I called you Tama-ram!" Maggie ran after her and Tamara squealed.

"Yea, what you said, I am not!" She scrabbled into the car, giggling with Maggie following after her.

Cedric spared them a small smile as he climbed into the cockpit, drawn by the hanging figure in the harness. He realized he was kneeling on the console of the cramped space and blinked when something dripped on his head. He wiped it off and rubbed it between his fingers, it was thin, red and warm. He swallowed down his queasiness and looked up. The pilot was bruised, pale and had a gash on the side of his head that seemed to still be bleeding. He smiled in relief, which was a good sign and figured they must have agitated the pilot's wounds when the hatch opened.

'Corpses don't bleed.' He reminded himself, his smile growing when a faint groan reached his ears and pained unfocused slits of violet stared into his before the pilot went limp in his harness.

oooOoooOoooOooo

Cedric looked at the bandaged face, pale and still beneath its coverings and hoped, not for the first time, that the kid would wake up. He stretched, putting away the depressing thoughts as he walked to the bathroom to get the medical supplies he needed to tend to the kid. He was whistling a tune when he returned to find Shalita Warrington at the door waving at him, leaning on her crutch in her other hand. Her micro braided, dark brown hair was pulled back into a high pony tail that stopped just past her bandaged neck. It was a small adjustment that brought more attention to the slight tilt at the corners of her eyes and the burn on the left side of her pretty, light brown face. He smiled at her and she did the same in return, entering the room

"With me here, the boy can get a proper bath." She said, taking the chair beside the bed and watching as Cedric set his materials on the bedside table to the left of the boy's bed.

"The doc said he shouldn't be moved."

"Please. Did you listen to him when he said I shouldn't be walking around?" She cocked a shapely brow at him and he smiled. "You really shouldn't doubt yourself, Cedric. You'll make a fine doctor some day. I know it or else I wouldn't be here-"

"Shalita." He interrupted, sounding exasperated. He wasn't good enough where it counted.

She shook her head. "No, it's true. The Doctor didn't do much for me when he arrived, just provided me with the appropriate pills." She a little bitterly, unable to keep her distaste out of her voice, "Stop putting yourself down. You can't bring back the dead."

Cedric stiffened at her words, holding the boys limp arm still and refusing to look at her as he made himself focus on his task. Shalita rose and went to the bathroom. Cedric sighed when he heard the water running in the tub. He'd just finished removing the gauze from around the boys' torso when she spoke again. "Now, what do you say ta helping that boy get cleaned up and that mess of hair washed?"

He nodded with a small smile, the clumped hair would be hell to wash but he had help. He glanced at Shalita as she helped remove the rest of the boys' bandages and felt the ache that he had always carried with him lessen and his body relax into his task. 'He's going to make it.'

tbc...

(1) www. trailmonkey. com/ usa/ dv2furncrkm.htm

Thanks to those who reviewed and read this! (huggles you)

Hey anyone out there live near or are really familiar with Furnace Creek, Cali/Death Valley? I would appreciate their input on this fic, email me!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimers: I garner no profit from this fic. I own nothing but the clothes on my back and Bobo, if the g-boys were mine, I'd be in heaven.

Warnings: Angst, spoilers in first part- Endless waltz alternate end- so AU, Shounen ai, character death

Pairings: 1+2, 1+R, 5xS, eventual 1x2, 3x4

AN: Editing frenzy

Wasurenai yo

by priscel

Three

Crosby beach. 'I never thought I'd see another sunset or take another breath without the constraints of training.' The messy haired speaker kneeled in the sand and pushed his hands in deep. He brought up two hands full and let the warm, sparkling grit flow through his fingers.

'Live, to live. To feel, to show what I feel . . . what, I felt.' He snorted humorlessly to himself at the thought of a long-haired fool running off at the mouth with a million easy smiles and an open heart. His nose flared at the heat building in his eyes. He had always thought that if anyone would make it through these wars, the hell they fought to live through . . . it would have been him. He had counted on that whenever the baka got captured or was sent on unpredictable missions that they've all had on various occasions, which could have been their last. He never asked himself why Duo did it, because he knew he wouldn't have hesitated to do the same. Actually, he had done the same thing, but the odds were in his favor.

'What I feel.' He stared over the bay and into the sea without moving, the salty sea breeze blew sand across his feet. He blinked up at the setting sun, the waves lapping at the shore and the marina's song filling the air. He watched the sky as the orange gave way to red, then mixtures of red and blue. 'Purple, violet, indigo, blue violet, amethyst . . . amethyst.' He thought they all were an adequate way of describing Duo's unique eye color, especially the last. He reached into his pocket and felt the cool metal there. He took it out and flipped it over in his hand as the fading sunlight glinted off its golden surface. He had found it the day after he left the hospital. Duo always kept it with him, and it not being on him meant something he would not accept or even consider true of the self-proclaimed God of Death.

"Heero?" He heard her coming before she'd pronounce the first vowel of his name. He shivered, no matter what he did, the girl had an uncanny ability in finding him.

This little time alone he had, he relished and he had time to think and be proud of his accomplishment without her annoying prattle. Today, he had narrowed down the location of the impact sites from the large chunk Duo had blown up to the west coast of North America. He caught himself repeating the words that followed him from the restless dream that drove him on, 'hold on . . . ' Two mornings ago, the dream came back to him during his drug-induced slumber. His friends had put it in his food, not that he ate much, but they had seen his failing health as he overworked himself and the Preventer Aid Unit (PAU) entrusted to him. He had agreed to stay in Sanc only because he couldn't stand for longer than 15 minutes, if he pushed it 20. But there were terms to his staying, he wanted to be in contact with the other PAU's and kept abreast on the survivors. He could guess the kinds of injuries Duo would have and looked through the critical patients list that Sally Po kept updated on the Preventer web page. Each pilot oversaw a unit in a different part of the world and made the Peacecraft manor in Kirkby their base of operations, while Zechs oversaw the aid in Sanc.

He would've dismissed the dream, but this time its was more compelling than before and laced with pain. He checked, the pain he felt wasn't from any of his injuries, but something else. He sought out Quatre, who he found looking pale in his lover's arms, for he had felt it too. Duo was awake. He didn't stop to think how he could feel so certain about something like that from a dream he was already forgetting, Quatre had felt him too and that was proof enough. They had come up on dead ends, empty leads that had the Preventer units questioning the pilots for their misuse of them when they had so many others to help. Thankfully, Quatre stepped in and switched over the search to the Maguanacs. They were leaving tomorrow for Nevada and Heero wanted to be as far away from Relena as he could get, but the beach was not far enough it seemed.

"Heero, you silly boy, you'll catch a cold out here. Especially with the way-"

"I'm fine." He rose smoothly, easily avoiding her outstretched hand centimeters from his shoulder and brushed his hands off on his jeans.

She held her outstretched hand by the wrist before clasping them together. A sad look crossed her face as she took in Heero's drawn, blank face - he still suffered from his injuries, though healing, were severe enough that even the doctors wondered how he was moving around and lucid. Despite her protests and the doctor's threat to have him committed, he left the hospital with Quatre on the fourth day shouldering on a Preventer's jacket.

That was one of the things she loved about him, his determination. He would find Duo. He completely ignored what Wu Fei told him about the hours he had searched for any indication that their comrade was still living. He ignored her when she strongly suggested he return to the hospital, but to her surprise he stayed at the Peacecraft manor. It frustrated her how he was so close but never around her and he hardly left the office that Millardo had made out one of their largest guest rooms. She, herself, had been out helping the wounded and opened up many of the rooms to house the large numbers of survivors from around the Kingdom when temporary shelters were too packed to hold any more people.

Yet, he barely acknowledged her efforts with a grunt. He barely saw _her_. She couldn't see why they missed him, he was rude, obnoxious and an undignified person who had done one glorious thing in his short life. She could see the value in that, she had suggested a memorial to him alone, even though it would be selfish for her to endorse only his death when others more deserving should receive such a tribute. But again, Heero refused and Quatre thanked her for her thoughtfulness, waving her away.

She had fumed at that, no one dismissed her so commonly. He was the one other person Heero might have listened to, but she couldn't reason with him that it was illogical to waste precious resources to find a dead comrade when so many were suffering. She swallowed nervously at the memory replaying in her mind, there was a peculiar glint in Quatre's gentle eyes when he gave her a glare that made Heero smirked. Earlier on, Quatre had admitted that he couldn't feel anything and that Duo could be just unconscious. Whatever that meant, but the possibility that Duo was dead was there in Quatre's voice and Heero seemed to slouch at those quiet words. If she could get Quatre to stop being foolish and accept it like Wu Fei then . . . then. She sighed, now, however, there was no swaying either of them. A couple of days ago she found Heero back at it with renewed vigor, talking to Rashid and then off without a word to her to find Wu Fei. They were going to meet Trowa in Nevada and go from there. They hadn't let her in on what had prompted their rushing off to the west coast.

But she already knew why and chose to ignore it.

"Heero, did you walk here?"

"..." Well that had seemed like a good idea at the time. He was better. The walk helped him gauge his endurance and when he would have to take breaks. He wasn't ashamed to admit that he had passed out the moment his butt touched the sand and that it was dangerous considering the erratic weather and temperature was expected to go higher than the 93 degrees it was today.

"Heero!"

He cringed at the sound of his name being screeched by her again. 'Damn, was that not a good enough answer?'

"Please, you need to take care of yourself. At the very least, let the doctor look at you . . ." she bit her lip, the doctors were prepared to drug him if she could get him to agree to see them. He looked as though he was considering it but then shook his head no. "Heero, it's been nearly a month. Wu Fei had said it himself that Maxwell must have used his internal explosives for there to be nothing left of his Gundam."

'Nothing left.' Heero smiled, squeezing the crucifix in his hand, letting the small biting pain from its edges fill him with hope in the tangible, hard proof that he and Quatre weren't wrong. He'd shown Wu Fei the cross a couple of days ago and laughed at the crumbling disbelief on his face. Wu Fei had admitted right there that he was not without fault or so perfect he was infallible. He was grieving too, and fell back into the rhythm of doing it stoically with quick acceptance. He also admitted that before he met the other pilots, dead was dead in most cases and the SDD guaranteed it. That was until he had met one Heero Yuy with his SDD happy thumb and who had managed to do the impossible: he lived through it. He told him what he learned and came to value the others as more than necessary accruements to win the war but reminders that he was not alone, that his losses were felt by his new family and that they were there for him time and time again.

Heero was shocked, to say the least, that his friend would reveal so much of himself as he held Duo's cross. But Duo had that effect on people even though this cross was the only affect/reminder of his presence. He identified greatly with his Chinese comrade. Absolutes set by others had ruled his life, left no margin for error only acceptance and the importance of completing the mission but not any longer. He gripped the necklace and bravely turned his attention back to the pink wildebeest that had followed him.

She frowned prettily at him. "Heero don't foolishly go throwing your life away and endangering your health on such a search. Besides, I saw and felt that explosion . . . you seriously can't think he's-"

"I did." He didn't want to hear this.

He glared as Relena did the fish thing. He would've smirked if it wouldn't lead her to questioning his sanity. "Not everyone can be you, Heero. Maxwell wasn't-"

"Damatte!"(1) He had always respected Relena, but he would have Quatre's doctor look him over once they got on the plane, but this again. He could describe the feeling as hurt mixed with the anger he felt when she spoke of Duo with such disregard. Somehow it just made him angrier when he heard it from her. He didn't know why she continued to insist that Duo was dead. Why couldn't she understand?

"You need to accept it, Hee-"

"There is nothing to accept, Relena. Would you just give up so easily if your brother had gone missing?" He stared at her evenly.

Relena's cornflower blues widen iin their disbelief, somehow Heero knew that she'd used Commander Une to covertly locate and tend to her brother. She lowered her eyes as color rose to her cheeks, when Une had told her that it was a fruitless endeavor after several months of searching, she had a royal fit and ordered her to continue the search. So... maybe she was a hypocrite.

"I won't be staying here any longer." She met his eyes again, what a picture he made with his tank top in one hand, his hair being blown to and fro by the building icy breeze. Relena couldn't stop her eyes from tracing the shiny, pinkish scar that ran from his right shoulder to the center of his chest, the brace on his right arm and the bandage around his waist. She couldn't stop the small sound of displeasure she made when he pulled his tank top back on; he looked good despite the injuries. "He is alive."

"And what if all you find is a dead body?"

Heero glared, that didn't sound anything like a question. A threat? No, not Relena. "Hn. Are you going back?" He wouldn't answer her question and if he had to he'd walk back.

She stood there and stared at him, then blinked when his back seemed to be getting farther away. "Heero, wait!" Her teeth chattered as the wind picked up. 'Heero couldn't seriously be thinking about walking home in _this_?' Her eyes went round as her hair was whipped forward by a stronger gust of wind and Heero stumbled. "Heero! Get in the car, you stubborn-"

"Baka?" He offered knowing that it and the mirthless chuckle that followed were lost in the wind.

"I asked." He tried again, his wariness and hunger catching up to him as Relena came up on his left side. She slid her fingers into the belt loops of his jeans so she wouldn't hurt his bandaged sides. Her response was cut off by another gust of wind and Heero smirked at her pouty expression. He'd got the last word in.

tbc...

(1) Be quiet

SDD - self-detonation device

this is a view of the beach Heero escaped too, http /upload. wikimedia. org/wikipedia /en /0/08/ Crosby(underscore)Beach(underscore)ship .jpg (no spaces)


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimers: I garner no profit from this fic. But if they want to give me a G-boy or two, I'd gladly accept them as a donation!

Warnings: Angst, spoilers in first part- Endless waltz alternate end- so AU, Shounen ai, character death?

Pairings: 1+2, 1+R, 3+4, 5xS, eventual 1x2, 3x4

AN: Editing frenzie

Wasurenai yo

by priscel

four

Three sets of small sneakered feet ran through the hall barely containing their laughter behind clenched teeth and hands. Bumping into each other, they scrambled into a custodial closet when they spotted a shadow at the end of the hall.

"Is he gone yet?"

"Ow! I wanna see too!"

"Shhh! We're gonna get caught."

Two pairs of brown eyes and one pair of green peered through the crack of the door and watched as a black-haired giant with fierce blue eyes ran half past them, then stopped to bellow, "Emy, Tamara, and Inari! Don't think you can hide forever. I'll find you and when I do the tickle torment will be unending." He added a menacing laugh before disappearing around the corner.

They all giggled in anticipation, piling out and stumbling up the steps to their ultimate goal. They had been kept away from the second floor rooms, especially from one room: it was the second door on the left from the stairs.

"It's not right," Tamara whispered as they edged over to the door, "that I can't bring my alien to show and tale. Even after I told him that he'd be alright." She shook her head in mock-adult disapproval, her stern expression was more akin to a huffy pout. "But you guys'll be the first to see him," she whispered excitedly with a bright smile.

"How do you know it's a he?" The green-eyed boy with bushy black hair challenged, bumping into Tamara when she stopped behind Emy at the second of several closed doors.

"'Cos he has long hair that I can brush for him."

Inari made a face and pushed his goggles further up into his hair, "that means it's a girl."

"No, it's a boy cos . . . cos _he_ is."

"Then why does he have long hair?"

"Be_Cos_ he's a special alien that does what I say, so I wanted him to have long hair and he does! So there." She stumped her foot and crossed her arms.

"It's an alien so he could be an it." The small auburn haired boy, Emy, offered with a quiet smile.

Inari smiled back then pursed his lips, his green eyes narrowing at Tamara. "That's nothing, my alien's a hundred times better than yours."

"So! I don't want your stinky alien anyways." She squared her shoulders and put her headless doll inside her shirt when she turned the knob and pushed it open slowly. She peered inside with the two boys at her back. She turned back to them with a smile, "He's sleeping. Shhh, come on."

They tiptoed into the carpeted room and inched toward the bed. It had been a week since she last saw her alien. When Cedric had brought him to their car, the boy seemed so small, smaller than her all balled up in the blanket. Cedric had told her that she wouldn't be able to see him for a while since he was hurt in a bad way. She knew that. She could tell by all the dark booboos that covered his arms and the blood on his face. She didn't know another word for booboo, but that's what they were because Alice called them that when she kissed the one Emy got on his arm from Inari pushing him.

Inari snorted at the pale and heavily bandaged body in the bed. "He doesn't look like an alien and his hair isn't that long."

"Yes it is."

"No, it's not. It looks like it stops at his shoulders like mine."

"Nah uh."

"And I bet he's not an alien, a mummy . . . Yea! With spiders and bugs all inside his body, so when he opens his mouth all you see is slime and webs."

"That won't work on me! So don't talk about my Alien like that and for your information his name's Crest." She wagged her finger at him, pantomiming a stern expression she'd seen Emanuel's Mom and their teacher Ms. McCaskill make when they wanted to get a point across to them.

"Eh? That's a stupid name, for a _stupid_ looking alien!"

"You meanie!" She yelled, stumping her feet before she smiled at him. "Giichi!"

"Huh?" He blinked at her in confusion. "How did you-"

"Giichi! Giichi!"

"Shut up! That's not my name!" Inari shouted, his voice rising each time she said it. His full name was Inari Giichi Takemura, he didn't understand why he had to have a middle name, especially one he didn't like.

Emanuel leaned against the wall and snickered as he watched his two friends yelling at each other and before long running around the beds after each other. Tamara had just bounced, half crawled across one bed before she turned and hit Inari in the head with her headless doll stopping the chase.

"Giichi!" She shouted with an excited squeal and jumped on the next occupied bed in hopes of escape at his playful cry of vengeance. Her pigtails smacked her in the face when two bandaged hands caught her shoulders.

"Iie! Tamara, Usse! You baka!" He had half his body on the bed when it shifted causing him to go tumbling down to the floor. "Ow. Tamara, why did you-" He gawked at the wrapped face that searched around the room blindly before settling one uncovered violet eye on him. Inari's initial shock faded and he scowled at pale face.

Tamara blinked up at the wrapped person who had turned her to sit on his legs while he held her still by holding her arms. She blinked when his lips moved in a soundless whisper as he stared at Inari who was sprawled, frozen on the floor. She leaned into him putting her ear as close as dared to his chapped lips.

"He-" She heard him half-say, then try to say it several times more.

"'He' what?" She looked from him to Inari who now sat cross legged on the floor with a frown on his annoyed, flushed face before turning his head obstinately away from the two on the bed. Tamara glared at Inari as she took Duo's cold hands from her arms and rubbed one large one between her own to warm it up. "Don't let Inari scare you. He always looks like that."

Duo blinked down at the bright brown eyed girl who smiled up at him before she blew a raspberry at Inari. Inari did it back and turned his back to them grumbling 'bakas' as he moved. The world doubled for a moment and all Duo could hear was the little girl calling to him, calling him 'Crest'.

'Crest?' He thought groggily, wincing and pulling his hand away only to have a glass of water pressed into it by the quiet boy who had been leaning against the wall.

"Tamara says you're an _alien_ but I know you're not because aliens have antennas." Emanuel said matter-of-factly with a smile as he took the glass back once Duo was finished and then plopped down next to him.

He had been awake a few times and he would use that term loosely because he remembered only glimpses of faces, voices and most of them was the sound of children playing. He had some odd dream about a church and almost always jerked into wakefulness, gasping for air and queasy with the taste of ashes in his mouth. These kids reassured him that he hadn't been dreaming, that there were children in this place. They also reminded him of something he couldn't put his finger on and knew it had something to do with why he got all choked up when he heard the sulking boy on the floor say that word.

"Well," she began with a slight pout, "not all aliens look like aliens y'know." She said matter-of-factly, putting her headless doll in his hand and smiling at him. "You can play with Lanely whenever you want. She chases the bad dreams away so you can borrow her for tonight if you need to." She said holding up the doll.

He blinked his one eye owlishly at the headless doll before taking it. The pull at the back of his left hand stopped him from looking at the doll more closely. He nodded his thanks as he examined his half-bandaged left hand, the IV that came out the back of it and led to two clear bags of liquid that hung from an antique coat rack.

"So you can't talk." The sullen looking boy laid his head on his crossed arms on the bed, inching closer to the mummy's leg, not wanting to be left out as his friends made themselves comfortable around the person. He eyed the mummy's long, uneven brown hair that mostly stopped just below his shoulders and pursed his lips so that bottom one stuck out in defiance. "But you sure don't look like an alien."

Duo let out a short bark of laughter before rasping out water and Emanuel rushed to give him another glass of it from the pitcher on the bedside table. Emanuel sat back on the bed with a curious expression that mirrored the other two. Duo smiled, holding the glass in his free hand, turning it back and forth in thought. "I'm not an alien, I think." He said with a gravely voice, taking a huge gulp from the glass to finish it off.

"Well you're not."

"Leave'im alone."

"Tamara, he's a peoplez. A _mummy _peoplez."

"A mummy peoplez?"

Inari nodded his head, a self-satisfied smirk that said 'I know what you are' directed at Duo. "They eat kids like us. They like the _girl_s best."

"So what Giichi, he's my peoplez and he won't eat me."

Inari made an irritated sound and turned away from the bed again with his head bowed. He didn't understand why the mummy had to get all the attention.

Duo leaned down and ruffled the shaggy black head of hair, inadvertently pushing the goggles down over Inari's eyebrows and chuckling at the boy's mumbled irritation. "Ok, so I'm a mummy then."

"Toldja!" Inari turned fully around and put his hands over the bandaged one on his head and gave Tamara an 'I was right' smirk.

"So! Crest is still my friend."

Duo nodded with an amicable smirk, "Though I'd rather play with you guys than eat you. Can you imagine how huge I'd be if the three of you were in here?" He pointed at his flat stomach and gestured with his right hand at the size his stomach would be as he continued to speak, "Bigger than an elephant!"

They laughed and offered larger animals, real and imagined, than the one he used. Tamara turned back to him with a hopeful look. "Crest, do like your name?"

"Hmm . . . I don't think 'Crest' suits me."

"Oh, that's ok."

"Toldja!" Tamara stuck her tongue out at Inari and Inari ignored her with a smug smirk as he sat cross-leg by Duo's feet. "What about Luciola?"

"That's your Dad's name."

Inari had a thoughtful look on his face. "Ok, what about Haku? Or Sumire (1) because of your eyes."

"No, Jack?"

"What's your name?" Emanuel asked logically not trying to give him a new name if he already had one as he bounced lightly on his knees on the bed.

Duo opened his mouth as if to respond, but came up short. He tried again, "Uh . . . ah . . . hmm . . . call me D." He got out with a pained smile, cradling the right side of his head over his bandaged eye. The sudden quiet made him realize he had closed his eye. He wanted to keep it closed, his eyelids felt so heavy but he dragged it open, surprised to be looking into three concerned faces.

"Does it hurt?"

"You ok?"

"Do you want some mo' water?"

He smiled at the three of them and lifted his heavy head in an attempt to answer to find small hands trying to steady him when he swayed, and fell forward.

"S'ok." Came his mumbled reply, unsure if he could say much else. He got his hands under him, though they shook with the effort of holding his weight, and gave them each a pat on top of their heads. He figured he'd moved too much too soon, not to mention the hollow pit that was his stomach didn't seem to want to hold the water he drank. He swallowed a few times and tried to give them a reassuring look and not a nauseous one but the smile was shaky at best as he slowly lowered himself to the bed. He almost blacked out from the pain that shot through his back when the muscles there gave out. He dropped to the mattress with a pained hiss and the children backed away.

"Here." Tamara scooped up Lanely from his lap and put her on his chest. "She'll make the hurt go away."

Duo gave another shaky smile and closed his eye. As he lapsed into unconsciousness, he wondered how he knew where each of his new friends was and that it was the one called Giichi who pulled the sheets up to his shoulders.

oooOoooOoooOooo

Cedric doubled back, asking himself for the seventh time why he agreed to play this game with the three rascals in the first place. Within the two hours of playing the game with them, he had found and chased them all over the place. And now the little buggers were nowhere to be found. Well not exactly, he had checked all the floors except the third.

He sighed, realizing whom they'd probably gone to see. He really didn't see why he had to look after the trio today minus one bored Maggie who was stuck with the other seventeen teens, receiving the 'talk' from the other adults. It was necessary though when they'd caught some of the teens getting 'freaky,' as Hank put it, in one of the empty rooms at the back of the Inn. Though he would've appreciated Maggie's help because Tamara would be spellbound by her idol/rival and he'd have tied the boys up. A corner of his mouth curved upward at the thought, 'Maybe I could just tie all three of them up when I get there.'

They were the most troublesome three out of all twenty-four kids at the Inn and they got into everything. He would talk to them and remind them to ask next time, though he'd admit that all the other times they did he had said no. But that was beside the point and didn't necessarily mean he would've said that this time.

He gave himself a wry smirk, of all the things he expected to find in that cockpit he never expected it to be a kid. He had told the girls that they had to keep it a secret what they'd found him in. The boy had been in terrible shape and for the life of him he couldn't figure how the boy managed to survive in that cockpit. The school nurse, Karen, had done what little she could, cleaning him up without jarring him but he was waif thin. They made sure to feed him less than half a cup of soup or water with a teaspoon and started all over again with what was left when he threw it up.

It was a painful four-day process but they had to get something into him to help keep him going until they could get a real doctor. He hated the way the other adults had put all the pressure on the two of them. He had already decided that if the boy died he would take full responsibility for it, but their behavior . . . just because he was a medical student didn't mean he had the full capabilities of a trained and tried physician.

Thomas, Pam and Jerry had been sent by the eldest members of their group (Hank, Karen, and Bishop & Jesse Harden) several times to LA in search of help and on the fifth day since the boys' arrival they brought back a harried old man. He was injured, called himself Campbell and told them that they should be grateful to have him because he had experience as a field medic. He and the trio scavenged for supplies and ended up coming back with a truck load of medical supplies along with some food and other necessities.

Everyone, who wasn't preoccupied with their individual tasks, bombarded the trio with questions about home. They told them that for the most part, the city had been evacuated. The Preventers had left, what was becoming their usual calling card, a toll free number so anyone could contact the rescue teams for help because they knew there were still many people hiding within the ruin city. The same number had come over the radio, he had tried it but it was almost always busy.

He'd gotten through once, though, and left a message entailing their location, that fifteen adults and forty-two children were boarding at the Inn with four injured people. He gave them no more than that. He didn't want to risk the kid being in worse hands. He could've just left him in that cockpit like Hank suggested and been no worse for ware. But that wasn't him, he believed in being a doctor and he wanted more than anything to save lives, make a difference through his practice even if it was in an insignificant way. He didn't want to see another person die, not like his family had.

He'd been reluctant to let Hank know anything, but the four-year, venerated police detective only shrugged it off and told him to tell him when he was ready. Once he did, Hank put it to him like this: Firstly, he owed him a lot for saving Shalita's life when he joined their group. Secondly, he had his reasons for agreeing to keep it secret and left it at that, leaving Cedric in his prided 4x4 Bronco to rig the cockpit with explosives.

That had left Cedric wondering, even more so when the good-natured 40-year-old cop lingered by the cockpit before returning to him to send it and all its bits tumbling down into the Canyon. Hank had been right that sealing the cockpit muffled the sound of the grenades going off inside.

Cedric stopped at the public phone to the right of the stairwell. One moment he had been staring at the phone in front him, the next he had the receiver to his ear and the last cold key, number 4, of the Preventer aid number depressed beneath his finger. He waited and glanced at the half-open door he was headed to, thinking but never quite giving voice to his mental machinations as he waited.

"starLA. All circuits are busy, please try your call again later."

He closed his eyes and with a tight self-reproaching smile he hung up.

'Why did I even bother?' But he knew why, many of the children wanted to go home and they all wanted to know if any of their family was among the survivors. He crossed the short distance to the open room. The door creaked when he pushed it all the way open. He rubbed at his eyes and guessed either Hank or Alice had come to visit the boy this morning and opened the curtains.

'It's too quiet,' he surmised as he listened to the boys' heavy breaths while rubbing his eyes.

"Maybe they went," His words trailed off as he smiled at the sight before him. His three charges were sound asleep around the boy they had found in the desert. The boy had Tamara's doll in his hand and Tamara had her head pressed to his hip. Inari was sleeping with his mouth open and his limbs all akimbo at the foot of the bed and over the boys' feet. Emanuel seemed to have wormed his way under the boys' right arm and was currently making a cheek size drool mark on the boys bandaged chest. He chuckled quietly and decided to move Emanuel first as he walked quickly past the other bed that was stripped bare to the bathroom.

He returned with a basin of water, two bottles of antiseptic, iodine and two packages full of gauze. 'Hmm still sleeping, lucky me.' He thought as he set the items on the bedside table and gently picked up Emanuel and placed him on the other bed and then did the same with the other two. He was relieved that the rug rats were sleeping, making it easier for him to keep an eye on them while he changed and cleaned the boys' burns and cuts.

He quickly and efficiently unwrapped Duo's left hand and cleaned the stitched gash there, removing dried blood and scabs as he made his way across the boys' calloused palm.

'The boy must have been moving around,' he hoped and then wondered what the boy had done to get such deep cuts in his hands as he quickly finished the dressing and did the same as he went up his arm to his shoulder where his uneven hair trailed across his chest.

'I really should even it up a little for him.' He thought, remembering how he unhooked the harness to find that in several places the boys' long braid had melted into some of the metal lining behind his seat and was burned in multiple places. He had to cut it to free him.

Cedric took in a quiet breath when he uncovered Duo's eye to find them both open and staring at him, except this time there was awareness in them than when he had first been caught by them in the cockpit. He smiled warmly, "Hey, I see you have yourself a fan club already."

Duo looked out the corner of his eye to see three lumps on the opposite bed behind Cedric. He smiled, he hadn't had that dream again, but he could smell the smoke. He tried to remember what he dreamed but it was already slipping away. He had been some place, a school, but there was quite a few schools and hundreds of different faces so none gave him one specific place he could try to remember. No one specific face . . . then there was two, no four familiar somethings in his head. They were people, but he couldn't see them through the fog there. He felt his head start to pound as he tried to make them clearer, to see who they were. They felt important, well at least to him, so he concentrated and just when he thought he was getting somewhere a bright light made him drop those strings of memory. Duo jerked and Cedric laughed half-heartedly.

"Sleeping with your eyes open Kid?" He joked, his smile fading when Duo pouted and turned away from him, the muscles of his jaw twitching as he gritted his teeth. Cedric saw the strain in Duo's face and sighed. "Sorry about that Kid. I guess I could have warned you before I checked your eyes." Cedric checked his eyes one more time before he began cleaning the long stitched gash that ran at an angle from Duo's right eyebrow up into his hairline near his right temple. He checked it for swelling, infection, asked Duo if he felt any pressure on his eye and then checked his head for tender spots.

Cedric brushed Duo's long bangs out of his eyes. "We should cut this..." Cedric suggested, wondering about the sudden glare then the confusion that crossed Duo's face before letting the unruly bangs sweep back down in front of his face. "I'm glad you're awake, it makes my task much easier and reassures me that you're not going to vegetate here and start sprouting leaves."

Duo smiled at that and winced when Cedric touched a particularly sore spot at the back of his head.

"It also lets me know if I'm causing you any discomfort. Now that you're awake, you should try laying on your side or sleeping upright. For a while until the tenderness subsides. If you can, let the Doctor know about it, with those three I have my hands full." He smiled again and Duo relaxed, his body tensed up the moment the black-haired man with oddly colored eyebrows entered the room and had been aware of his every movement even though he couldn't seem to wake up as fast as he wanted. He squeezed the arm that was looped in front of him, supporting him as Cedric removed the bandages on his back. His back felt like it was on fire when the air touched it and he couldn't help the whimpering sound he made when Cedric began washing his back. He blinked up at the sorrowful blues that were apologizing before the words actually hit his ears.

"Sorry, bare with it for a while. It seems you opened up a few of these too."

Duo stared at Cedric even after Cedric turned back to his task. Blue. Cedric's eyes were blue but those weren't familiar, those weren't the ones he remembered. The ones that came to mind were speckled with grey, and he thought they were the deepest blue he had ever seen. 'The murky ocean depths where I hid my buddy a few times when I came to Earth.'

Duo gripped the side of his head from the pain as images of a massive mobile suit with haunting green eyes flashed behind his eyes.

"Hey."

He shook his head, but the small movement sent a fresh wave of pain through him.

"Hey, Kid." This time the voice became more urgent. Duo sluggishly opened his eyes to see Cedric's concerned face. "Kid, stay with me. Just shout or hit me if it hurts, don't bottle it up like that."

"I-I want t-to to remember."

Cedric carefully kept his facial expression in check as he looked down into the boys' pinched face. Doctor Campbell warned him that Duo had severe head trauma and that without the appropriate equipment they had no way of determining the extent of the damage.

He smiled at the boy, "Don't go popping brain cells by forcing it." He flicked Duo's upturned nose and smiled again when Duo glared, the pain in his face falling away. "Remember you're still recovering and all those knocks you took to that noggin' of yours may be limiting what you can recall. Let it heal and be happy that you're awake. According to the books you shouldn't be conscious. But I have it on good authority that you'll be as good as new in no time." At Duo's quizzical look, he nodded toward the sleeping jumble of limbs on the other bed and then put the doll in Duo's freshly bandaged hand.

Duo squeezed it and sighed as Cedric began working on his back again. "Do you know me?"

Cedric paused before dipping the rag in the basin at the quiet longing in the boy's scratchy voice. "No."

Duo bowed his head, ignoring the protest of the aching muscles in his neck, so his long bangs covered his face. He was staring at his hands, watching them shake even though he fisted them in hopes of stopping the uncontrolled movement. '_Weak_. I am not weak.' He listened to Cedric when he started talking again, blocking out the word that echoed in his mind which for some reason he associated with a blurred but distinctively Asian face. "But you are more than welcomed here. Like those little buggers over there, I'd like to be your friend. I'm Cedric, by the way, so what can we call you? I don't mind addressing you as 'Kid' but for the most part, it would get a little confusing seeing as how I tend to call all the other kids around here 'Kid'."

Duo smirked, "Call me D."

"Heh, an initial." Cedric shrugged. "It's better than 'Crest'."

Duo tilted his head to the side in question as he peeked up at Cedric through his bangs, Tamara had called him that. He arched a brow when he was jostled slightly by Cedric's sudden laugh.

"Its Tamara's favorite toothpaste."

Tbc...

(1) Sumire is general Japanese word for violet, regarded as a girl's name but Inari doesn't know that.

Bishop - Be-shup is Shoshone for 'red clay'.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimers: I garner no profit from this fic. But if they want to give me a G-boy or two, I'd gladly accept them as a donation!

Warnings: Angst, AU, Shounen ai, character death, Quatre torture

Pairings: 1+2, 1+R, 3+4, 5xS, eventual 1x2, 3x4

AN: editing frenzie

Wasurenai yo

by priscel

five

The evening sky was clear for the first time in several weeks. It was like the sky was a canvas the Night painted with the deepest of blues and the stars random flicks of white paint that stood out brighter than the dwindling lights from the city of Duckwater in the distance.

'Pancake Range.' He traced their route through the range on the map and looked over the arid and mountainous landscape. His brow twitched when his eyes caught movement in the shrubs a few feet ahead.

"A deer?"

"Antelope." Rashid answered, though it sounded like he wanted to say more.

Quatre ignored the urge to ask him to say it, already knowing it would be a tentative nudge to get him to get some rest. The antelope scurried away from the beam of the headlights and into the safety of the shadows. His eyes returned to watching the landscape and thought, 'We could live here as though nothing happened.' He rested his head against the window, a sad smile on his playing on his lips. 'That's just how peaceful it is.'

He would cherish a calm night like this, one among so few that left him with some sense of normalcy. Relena had dragged that concept through the dirt and back several times in her argument on the importance of the work they were doing together. 'She could always make a convincing argument.' Yet then again, so could he. They listened to her song and dance while they packed their things. He had long since been immune to its infectious beat, but he couldn't say that about the others. Maybe Trowa, but Heero had always been there to help her despite his annoyance with her trailing him wherever he went. Though, he seriously doubted Heero would abandon all the work he'd done to narrow down Duo's location to Relena's sudden whims.

Wu Fei, he could never tell. It had been a shock to find him supporting Barton, though he knew Wu Fei was already punishing himself for his actions. But there was no placating the man, even after he'd assured him that they held no ill toward him for his decision. So when Relena focused her efforts on Wu Fei, he had been unsure of the outcome. They needed him but if he felt he was needed more at Relena's side then they would let him do as he wished. Though Quatre was happy to find he had been too presumptuous. Wu Fei had held up a hand stopping her mid-spiel, giving her a respectful bow and simply said, "We've decided. _We_ are going."

Quatre smiled at the memory of a red-faced Relena, who couldn't have followed even if she wanted to because someone in her position brought hope to the world that not all was lost. She had, unknowingly, made herself the figurehead of the restitution efforts and couldn't go overseas no matter how much she wanted to. Even then, there would have to be some stability in the world as a whole, appropriate security measures with the man power to back it which wasn't happening anytime soon with the Preventers and every other law agency stretched thinly everywhere. But Quatre was thorough, so if by chance there was even a small possibility that Relena would have the opportunity to follow, they had Zechs and Noin ready to make sure she didn't sneak off and go endangering herself in her pursuit of Heero.

He rubbed his temples, looking at the eleventh 'x' on the map, they were headed for Lockes. So far, Nevada had minimal damages in the majority of its Northern regions except for Cherry Creek and Ely. He just hoped it was the same for many of the cities in the southern portion of this state.

'Back to the compass and map.' Quatre thought with a small smile when he considered that his empathy was their compass. The use of GPS was limited and though they could get access to the Internet, they knew that getting access to a satellite would be next to impossible with the heavy use of them by Aid efforts everywhere. They were lucky that with a little help from his sisters, they were given authorization for flight despite the restrictions on travel.

He wanted to try reaching out for Duo again but he was sure nothing would come of it except for more the incoherent, fragmented images or fleeting feelings he was giving off. It was like Duo was there but not. Sometimes, interestingly enough, when he was near Heero he got clear images through his link with Duo: a room, a little girl, a woman with a scarred face, a tall shadowy figure, fuzzy brows. Whenever the oddly colored fuzzy brows came to mind he chuckled, but there was never anything definite.

The images, though, were what got him every time. Since the incident he picked them up along with partial words like a TV with poor reception but the emotions were sharper. Before, he could sense those around him or people he cared for if concentrated hard enough, but even that had been limited by distance. He closed his eyes and felt the numbing fear he'd sensed earlier become anxiety then an edgy calm the further away their caravan got from the antelope they'd frighten earlier. He was improving, he sniffed as quietly as he could under Rashid's watchful eye at the familiar tickle in his nose. Yet each time he tried to find Duo with his empathy, it felt like he was slipping away. They needed to find Duo, not just for their sakes but for Heero's.

He gave Rashid a sleepy smile as he patted his shoulder and gave up the passenger seat to Wu Fei. He walked into their six-person Kea motor home. He smiled, collapsing into the seat on his left. 'Rashid really did know how to prepare for any excursion,' he thought, leaning with his elbows on the table as he gazed out the window. The headlights of the vehicle behind them flashed in greeting, he stuck his head far enough out the window to wave before closing it so that it was only open half way. They were being followed by four other vehicles attended by five other Maguanacs. They had enough supplies to offer what assistance they could and when they went into the cities they used the two Jeeps to avoid drawing too much attention to themselves. He glanced back at the man he'd come to think of as a second father, smiling as he mumbled. "And I thought I was thorough."

They had Heero's laptop that Heero had produced from somewhere. Since the beach incident, Heero was the first to begin making preparations to leave but he was always by his or Wu Fei's side. He rested his chin on his upraised hand and wondered if Heero had hid it in some secret compartment in his spandex. He snickered to himself briefly, his smile becoming melancholy as memory reminded him of their braided friend. Duo always joked about that and he would have taunted Heero if he had known their friend had worn those things under his jeans that day.

He took a deep breath, his eyes returned to the interior of the cabin where Heero shifted in the seat across from him as his face slowly turned away from the window. He stared at his friend's sleeping face before his eyes were drawn to the back of the cabin where Trowa's long limbs shifted and stretched over the seats. He knew that his bed had been turned down before he even peeked up at the cozy little overhead resting space. He wondered why his friends hadn't prepared their own, but he knew why, they were just as concerned about him as they were worried about Duo.

A darker, more morose part of him laughed and mockingly said that wasn't the real reason. They were all exhausted and healing but he would never admit to any of them how little he was sleeping if Trowa wasn't there. To say he was a wreck while Trowa spent one week in South America constructing a framework and reliable line of communication between with the Preventers there and then the following three days and four long hours apart while Trowa worked with his team in Cherry Creek, Nevada was a gross understatement.

He was not himself. He worked his PA unit with frigid exactness. Though his facial expression made him look gentle, his eyes were cold and hard when he gave his unit orders. Orders like continuing to other impact sites when the casualties among the civilians at one city outnumbered the survivors they came across. His one saving grace was that they were doing multiple sweeps of the areas. He mumbled a few words stating this and the men who wanted to challenge him held their tongues while the others commended him for 'staying in perspective'. They didn't know how much he was struggling to keep it together and he liked it that way. He shivered at the memory, well at what he could recall of the day Duo blew up the colony chunk. 

o O o

Quatre had lost consciousness from the shockwave of pain that overwhelmed his senses as the explosion rocked them. Moments later, Trowa sat him down in the nearest chair with one long-fingered hand resting on his right shoulder keeping him upright. Quatre's head lolled to the side, coming to rest against Trowa's side as Trowa balanced himself on the left arm of Quatre's seat. He waited patiently with Quatre for the doctor to come look him over. The doctor patching up Heero moved to come to them when Trowa heard a muffled, strangled sound. Before he knew it came from Quatre, Quatre had jerked out of the chair and out of his reach. He stared in disbelief and his ears protested at the horrible screams that seemed to be ripped from Quatre's lungs.

Quatre could feel them all: they were burning, screaming, grieving and dying. Dying. Overwhelming him as more screams of anguish cracked against the inside of his skull. They were emotions but somehow they were screaming. He screamed along with them, a little of him dying with each life he felt flicker out. He could hear Relena ridiculing him, the emotions of everyone in the room when their success had been a Pyrrhic one. He could hear everyone but Heero and Trowa. And for that he was grateful, though he wasn't aware of much else. He didn't respond to Trowa pinning him to the wall or to the grip Trowa had on his hands.

Quatre went into convulsions, foaming spit seeping out the corners of his mouth as Trowa desperately tried to keep him still. The doctor that had been treating Heero was at his side but somehow Quatre got free of Trowa's hold on him and his fist whipped out in a deadly arch cracking against the side of the Doctors' face, bruising several officers and nurses that tried to help him. Trowa caught Quatre's punishing fist and managed to cross Quatre's arms over his chest, imprisoning them between their bodies. Trowa slid down the wall with him, forcing Quatre's mouth open and holding onto the other teen's tongue when the doctor warned him that he could swallow it or bite it off.

Quatre was trembling in the circle of Trowa's arms, the mental gauntlet that assailed his every sense was slowly receding to the edges of his mind. He could smell his blood and felt it trickled from his nose and something warm drip out of his pulsing ears. His jaw and mouth hurt like it had been stretched. Before he could access anything else about his condition, he was distracted by the annoying pat of a warm, moist cloth to his face. He turned away from the warm compress as it pressed to his nose. The hand that held it hesitated before following, pressing against his nose and pushing his head sideways to rest on a partially exposed chest. Quatre recognized then the hands and chest that he felt, without pain, was Trowa's.

He watched with disinterest as a nurse approached their intertwined legs with what he guessed was a tranquilizer shot. 'Don't touch me.' He thought, his head listing forward cutting off his air as he swallowed painfully, tasting the thickening glob of his own blood before it went down so he could breathe through his mouth. In the second he blinked, he was screaming again when the nurses' bare hand touched his skin.

He panted. His pulse pounding in his ears as he was shifted and ensconced in sheltering warmth that he unconsciously burrowed against. He shakily rubbed away the gummy substance that was over his eyes, opening them as slits before blinking owlishly around the room.

Everyone was gone. How long had he been out?

Movement by the door told him not everyone had left, his frayed senses instinctively reached out and he winced at the shock of pain that had him tasting blood again. But he could see that it was Heero at the threshold of the entryway with Relena supporting him. She was urging him to move but he stood there stubbornly, a mess of patched gauze, staring at him . . . no them. He was sitting, half laying on the floor, wrapped around Trowa and he him. He thought he heard humming but he realized all he could hear was the hammering of his heart against his eardrum as he watched Relena's lips move soundlessly. A disparaging look contorting her face when he didn't reply to whatever it was she was saying.

That was when he realized that something was wrong. There were no more voices, only a dull thumping that he hadn't really noticed until now. He shivered, feeling empty and clammy all over. The last time something like this had happened, he had nearly killed Trowa.

He froze. Slowly tilting his head up so his wide aquamarine eyes could look at Trowa. Trowa was still. Quatre took a shaky breath as he waited in the loose loop of Trowa's arms for that telltale sign of life: the rise of his chest beneath his torn shirt as he breathed. He couldn't trust his hands to find a pulse. He bit his lip when Trowa's dark brown lashes remained lowered, showing no signs of them opening or fluttering against his skin as he had seen them do hundreds of times as he slept.

With an unsteady hand, he touched the smears and flicks of blood that marred Trowa's pale face. He had imagined Trowa actively holding him.

He had imagined it.

He had done the unthinkable and Trowa had died keeping him from harming anyone else. The world doubled with each beat of his heart as the word 'monster' reverberated in his head. He could hear the screams of anguish and the tsunami of emotional distress encroaching on his raw senses. It was comparative to a song of promised pain sprinkling salt on his open, bleeding senses and his tears were its accompaniment.

'I've earned it.' He thought cynically, untwining their limbs as he backpedaled out of Trowa's slack embrace. 'That's why everyone's gone. I'm the reason why Relena is taking Heero away.' His mental voice breaking up as the thumping in his began to pound the further he moved away from Trowa.

He managed to get his legs under him and started to push himself up when he was pulled back down and squeezed tightly. He felt a warm hand touch his face before he found himself looking up into half open verdant eyes.

"Tro-" He touched his throat, his voice sounded like something out of a horror movie. He smiled deprecatingly at the thought. It reminded him of Duo. He laughed, it was a breathy sound, horse and scratchy once it left his mouth. Unchecked tears ran down his face as he pushed out of Trowa's arms and wondered why he was always losing the people he loved.

He was convinced that Trowa was dead and he was hallucinating. He must have sounded quite unstable laughing without sharing the joke because someone was shaking him. But that really didn't matter, he was losing it again. He was sure that this time there would be no coming back from the mental assault. He was still laughing when he felt the hand that was so much like Trowa's swipe at the tears on his face and then cup his cheek. Before he could turn away from the guy, _Trowa_, he pressed his mouth to his. In the moment their lips touched, the tender hold he had on his sanity strengthen and the void he thought would swallow him whole was being forced back once more.

He tried to giggle into the kiss, baffled that such a chaste and clumsy thing could have grounded him so. His body was tense but compliant in Trowa's hands and he idly wondered if Trowa thought he'd been drinking.

'I'm drunk on Trowa.' He really wished he could giggle but the horse sound he made earlier would probably worry Trowa more. It felt so good to let go as something-a half translated, partially veiled emotion- tickled his strained senses. He had always been receptive to Trowa's emotions, so much so that they sometimes came across as thoughts. Trowa's thumb flicked across his cheek catching an errant tear. He thought he was going crazy going through so many highs and lows in such a short period of time, but his happiness was bubbling up in him and he figured he could stand a little more pain if his empathy could decipher what it was he'd felt from Trowa.

His aching muscles that had begun to relax tensed up again when doubt swelled up in his mind. It occurred to him then that this was a necessary measure to save a friend from going into shock, effectively stopping a shock with a shock. The thought that it was nothing more than that had him pushing away again, breaking the kiss. What Trowa had done would have to be enough for him to stay aware of who and where he was . . . even if knowing that meant that there was no 'together' with Trowa.

'Better this,' he thought, 'than the false hope of there ever being anything.' He felt he had ruined that chance long ago. He tilted his head slightly at Trowa's moving mouth and wondered why Trowa was mouthing words to him when he could hear the voices calling for him. He opened his mouth to ask that when Trowa crushed his mouth to his in a bruising kiss. It forced all thought from his mind and stole his breath away, literally. He lost consciousness mid-kiss. 

o O o

He had never known how open the mind could be just before death. He hadn't expected to be imprinted with the snippets of thoughts, regrets and hopes of the dying. He rubbed at his temples again. If he had only closed himself off instead of trying to use his empathy to reach Duo then he wouldn't have lost it like he had. He would have been of greater use to the others.

'Why do I always lose the people I love?'

It hurt to remember the forethought, but it was one of the many echoes he lived with now. He wouldn't give it up, not that one. It was warm and familiar. It was Duo. That had been one of the reasons when Heero had come to him asking if he could sense Duo that he gave him a doubt-filled answer. The more Trowa shielded him, the more he came to understand that he wasn't just picking up the dying.

Trowa's concern was a wonderful embarrassment, allowing him to wake every morning with him at his side. Sometimes when the dreams were too much, Trowa would climb in bed with him and hold him until he could sleep. Heero had seen them there one of those times. Even though it made them appear to be a couple to everyone else, he knew the truth. He watched as Trowa shifted again, his face relaxed by sleep and those long lashes fluttering as he dreamed. There was no point in deluding himself. Foolishly, he pushed a kiss with Trowa and it ended with Trowa checking his eyes, his temperature and putting him to bed. Alone.

That had been his proof that nothing would come of it. He knew it as well as his doubts and fears. He was afraid of the time he'd slip up, overexert himself, and Trowa wouldn't be there or couldn't get to him fast enough to stop the whispers from engulfing him. He clenched his teeth, that sort of dependency, clinging to Trowa like a lifeline, was not how he wanted to live. At least he knew that Duo felt the same way Heero felt for him.

He sighed. He didn't have a choice in the matter. If he lost it when Trowa wasn't around, there would be no saving him. No one, not even Trowa, knew how very sensitive and raw he was on the inside, even after a month. He knew better; it would take a long time for wounds like this to heal. 'You can't go to a doctor and have it looked at or treated,' he thought bitterly, thinking back to the loss of his father and how Trowa had been the one to bring him back in the end. His neediness . . . that same dependency, he felt, was why Trowa remained at his side no matter where he went since they met up at Cherry Creek. He blamed himself for that, just when he had some room to breathe . . . That was a lie right there, he had been deathly afraid he wouldn't be able to keep it together while Trowa was away in the states.

Yet, he had done it and made a fool of himself again on the day they met up with him. Trowa had been kind enough to accept his exuberant hug. Releasing him, Quatre had suggested that they use his empathy to point them in the right direction since Heero's work had narrowed down the search considerably. His friends refused his offer and like an ungrateful brat he did it anyway. Shutting out their concerns- he wasn't well enough, he should take it slow, do it when he was ready.

The only thing he regretted about what he had done was Trowa's stunned, pale face as he hemorrhaged from his nose and went into convulsions. Quatre remembered saying something as he pointed them in a direction and Trowa, who had familiarized himself with the topography of the state, told them that the Nellis Flight academy was in that direction before the bleeding started. He'd been rushed to a hospital and their search delayed by two days.

He smiled, just as they had snuck sedatives into Heero's food to make him rest, he had to promise them he wouldn't: overextend himself, wouldn't use his abilities unless they had all agreed to him doing so and when he did use them it would be for very short periods after which he would rest. Those had been the terms that he was coerced to agree upon under the threat that Rashid would tie him to his hospital bed and force feed him tapioca pudding.

He smiled. Rashid seldom babied him like that but it did lighten the glaring concern he had been receiving from everyone.

Tapioca pudding wasn't all that bad either.

It had been a week since then and by following the 'guidelines' his friends had set for him, he had succeeded in getting Trowa to switch off of his mother-hen-watch-dog mode and the 'nap time' made it possible to cover up the nose bleeds or get rid of the bloody after taste he sometimes got. Though with Trowa there were still the little things. He glanced back at the made bed, he was tired but he didn't intend to let a beautiful night like this slip away.

He filled a kettle with water and put it on a burner set to high. Just thinking about the metallic taste of his own blood unsettled his stomach. He shifted through the drawer filled with tea and smiled back at the two in the front seat. He picked up one at random, putting the scented packet to his nose and smiled in pleasure.

'Orange chamomile,' he smiled taking out three mugs, then a fourth on second thought. He leaned over the counter with an unconscious, though slight, contented wiggle to his hips as he explored their new found treasure trove of teas.

He was inhaling the heady cinnamon spice-filled aroma of a blended black tea when a half-thought out image invaded his senses, sending a wave of sensual heat through him. The tea pack fell forgotten to the counter as he sat up and glanced around the cabin then at the doorway to the cabby. The erotic image was disconnected from its owner and so it began to fade, showing him the fuzzy dream of someone getting it from behind while leaning over a table or counter top.

He splashed cold water from their kitchenette onto his heated cheeks. He carefully _felt_ around him once more, he figured it had to come from someone close by since he hadn't been using his ability. But then again, the person could have been projecting it strongly. He felt somewhat relieved that it didn't seem to belong to anyone he knew. He jerked upright at the quiet whistle from the kettle. He figured he was picking up someone else's dreams and glanced at Heero, who was still sound asleep. He shook his head, Heero was blissfully dead to world.

'Trowa or Wu Fei must have gotten him to take the sedative again.' He was thankful that his own insomnia hadn't been noticed yet. He didn't think he could take being locked inside some of the dreams he had. He brought Rashid and Wu Fei two mugs of hot water then returned with and impish smile as he held his cupped hands full of tea to the both of them. They smiled their thanks and Quatre settled on a vanilla Chai when he went back into the cabin. He sipped it as he leaned against the side of Heero's seat, looking out the window. Quatre blew over the hot, sweet-smelling liquid in his mug when he felt Trowa presence before he walked past him.

'Quiet moments like this . . .' Quatre smiled over his cup at Trowa, realizing he'd still been blowing his tea when Trowa gave him a slight nod in greeting. 'I can bear it and appreciate this if it is all we'll ever be . . . Just as long as he doesn't hold me. Duo would probably say that's the result of reading to much poetry or the words of a martyr.' He looked away, his left arm dropping to rest across his stomach while the other still held the mug posed to his mouth, the wisps of steam curving upward and toward his lips as he inhaled.

oooOoooOoooOooo

He really preferred coffee but tea would do for now. He had just dropped a tea packet into his mug when his eyes caught the sight that Quatre made. He was barefoot, wearing loose beige slacks and an untucked, button-down white shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. The shirt was form fitting so the outline of his toned chest and the hard point of one erect nipple greeted his perusal with interest. His came to settle on Quatre's slightly damp bangs, sticking to random places along the sides of his face and the faint flush to his cheeks. He wanted to brush those wet bangs away from his face, he wanted . . . he stopped the thought when he was flashed by his waking dream, a waking wet dream to be precise. But dream Quatre had been wearing the very same clothes before he removed them, bent him over and . . . those lips. He sent a glare at the steam that curled about Quatre's lips but kept it to a minute twitch of his eyebrow.

Trowa chided himself while he kept a careful restraint over his emotions. Quatre was in no condition to receive anything more than friendly feelings from him. He'd seen how the blonde empath reacted to stray emotions; he unintentionally acted on them. Several times it had happened and Quatre had no memory of it nor of the names he spoke. They agreed not to tell him either. One time he woke in the chair by Quatre's bed and found him gone. He caught up to the small blonde to find Wu Fei twisting Quatre's hand in an attempt to stop him from slicing his wrists with a kitchen knife.

He closed his eyes as the green tea bled into the water and let the quiet of the cabin soothe him. He wouldn't let anything like that happen again. And he wouldn't let his emotions leak out and drive Quatre to act on feelings for him that weren't his own. He'd wait, but that wouldn't stop him from missing that kiss even if his emotions had driven Quatre to do it.

oooOoooOoooOooo

"You have a message." The synthesized female voice prompted, dispelling the default screen saver with a twirling envelope icon.

The blue glow from the computer brought life to the muted walls and sparsely decorated bedroom. A resounding click flooded the living just beyond the door with light shortly followed by the clank of keys and the sound of a door shutting. The computer chimed and the message repeated.

A blue illuminated hand used the mouse's cursor to click the email prompt. Deep brown eyes crinkled at the corners, moving from line to line. He sat down in his chair, it rolled back a little from his desk as he smiled. "One's all I need to catch the rest."

Tbc . . .


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimers: I garner no profit from this fic. I don't own nor did I create the GW universe, I'm simply letting my imagination have its wicked way with the characters therein.

Warnings: Angst, AU, Duo torture, language

Pairings: 1+2, 1+R, 3+4, 5xS, eventual 1x2, 3x4

AN: Editing frenzie.

Feedback is appreciated.

Wasurenai yo

by priscel

six

Alice hummed as she sorted through her few possessions, many of her clothes were too big and she didn't know whether to be happy that she was finally losing weight like she wanted to after years of trying and never succeeding. She smiled bitterly to herself. She never wanted to lose it like that. She shook her head as a memory of Cedric's grief stricken and soot-covered face resurfaced. She wouldn't put names to the images in her mind, her stomach ached uncomfortably at what she did remember.

She held up her size twenty jeans and looked at her long T-shirt wearing body that was now a size fourteen. She sighed, her occupied hands dropping to her lap and imagined her self on TV advertising that depression was her weight-loss success story. She snorted to herself and ran her hand through her mousy, rust-colored hair. She was going to need a hair cut soon. She couldn't stand wearing it past her ears.

"Yahooo!" Came the jubilant squeal.

"Ahh!"

"Maggiee!"

"Get the hell off my bed!"

"Maggie!" Alice admonished said girl with a displeased look on her round face.

"Maggieeeee! Wake UP!"

Alice smiled as she laid across her bed and laughed quietly to herself when Maggie hit Tamara with a pillow that only made her switch from bouncing around her on the bed to jumping up and down.

"Quit it!"

"Get up!" Tamara shouted happily.

"No!"

"Ok!" Tamara ran over to Alice's bed and took her pillow and then proceeded to beat Maggie awake with it.

"Argh! You-ooph!" Maggie stopped talking and fought back with a pillow in each hand.

Alice smiled, "This is going to be an eventful day." She picked up her pillow and joined the party.

oooOoooOoooOooo

In the kitchen, Alice found Emy and Inari contributing to the mess Hank was making all over the counter.

"Guys!" Three sets of eyes gave her innocent looks. She tapped her foot waiting for an explanation even though she thought of the older man as one of the best cooks around, she really didn't approve of his messy way of doing it. The tall black man gave her his best winning smile which instantly deflated when she continued to watch them as if she was a mother scolding her children.

Emy hopped up on the counter and began munching on a cookie from a large tin can. More specifically, a snowflake decorated, tin can of Dutch butter cookies that she had painstakingly hidden. It had been her secret weapon against the little monsters, using the promise of a special treat to tame them when others were dumped on her for one explainable reason or another.

Emy smiled at her, thick globs of spit meshed cookies covering his teeth as he began to bounce in place on the counter. It was the first sign of his sugar high and she knew he'd eaten the cookies with the sugar sprinkles because Emy really loved those the most. She also knew she would be the one stuck with him, trying to make sure he didn't break anything when he started bouncing off the walls and not Hank. Getting Cedric to help was out of the question because he had his hands full with the girls and Drew.

She glared at the source of her ire. She was going to get answers out of the rambunctious black man for once even if she had to use a gooey Emy to do it. She stepped toward the three when Inari ran past her like the hairball she often accused him of being.

"Shalita!" He whined, hugging the shorter woman's legs. "We were going to surprise you! Go back!"

"Oh, were you?" Shalita smiled, resting her hand atop his bushy black hair. "Sorry honey. Thanks for being so thoughtful."

Alice looked on in surprise at the normally selfish boy and thought perhaps, she'd been wrong about the little furball. Shalita took his grubby hand and hobbled in slowly. Alice reached out to steady Shalita, her eyes widening when Inari pushed her hand away and stuck his tongue out at her.

'No, I was right.' She glared at the boy who turned and shook his butt at her. She'd had enough. 'I'll noogie him the moment he lets go of Shalita.' She decided, even though she found herself heading back toward the kitchen doors when she heard Cedric shouting.

"D! Damn that kid!" He swiped frustratingly at his brownish black fringe.

"Cedric, language!" She reminded him. Despite the fact she hated kids, particularly snot nose little bully boys, she was still mindful of them.

"Goddamn it!"

"Cedric!" She whispered harshly, grabbing hold of his unoccupied hand.

He offered an apologetic smile, "Sorry. That kid's gonna give me more gray hairs than Maggie, Tamara or the boys put together." At her quizzical look in her brown eyes, he shifted his other arm to reveal the bundle in his arm were clothes. "That kid's running around butt-ass-naked!"

She laughed and stopped when she saw the serious expression on his face. "You're joking right?" She stood stock still before a good tug from Cedric had her moving again. Cedric was all worked up again and even though he often seemed indifferent to the little monsters, he was very protective. Their charges had them running all over the place most of the time.

"Have I told you how much I hate kids?"

"Yea, I think I'm starting to agree with you." Cedric commented distractedly. "The Kid overdid it with the exercises the Doc suggested and bled through his clothes before I could get him to stop. That hard headed brat." He grumbled as he checked closed doors on his way toward the exercise room at the back of the Inn near the pool. He opened another door and scowled into the empty room making the dust bunnies scurry away in fright. "I went to scrounge up something for him to wear while he showered to come back to an empty room. He's so bullheaded."

Alice snickered and gave Cedric a sad smile as she followed him out to the pool. Cedric often spoke of his brother in the same manner.

"Hey Bishop, have you seen a twerp about yeh-high," he leveled his hand with Alice's shoulder. "With a foot long plait, running around here butt-"

Alice punched him in the arm, wondering if he liked saying those three particular words together. The weather had been in the 80s for the past two days after a three-day down pour. It overfilled the pool and made many of the wildflower patches outside of the Inn into a dangerous slush of mud and sand. They really had to watch the children and make sure they didn't go exploring those colorful patches unawares of the quicksand underneath. Alice guessed that was part of the reason why Cedric was so worried. Although Drew was far from being an eight-year-old, he got into his fair share of mischief.

Bishop chuckled at the pair, the other four adults supervising the youth playing in or around the pool gave them a cursory glance before continuing their vigil over the children. Bishop nudged his reading glasses further up on his nose with the knuckle of his index finger and pointed at the stoned inlayed hearth identical to the one they were seated in front of with an amiable smile. "Oh no need for more of a description than that, we'd know your little brother even if he shaved his head painted himself yellow."

Cedric smiled, the tight expression on his face becoming lax at the notation.

"Though, I'd hardly call him walking around in too big boxers and a tank top being naked." He stood up to his full height, which was 5'4 and heavy handedly patted Cedric on the back. "But the boy should be behind there. I told him not to go wandering around out there." Bishop smiled sympathetically, the lines of his 60 years showed around his eyes and the bands of silver hairs that ringed his head faded into his once dark brown hair accentuated his long face. "Don't forget, you're not alone in this."

Cedric nodded absently already heading toward the hearth.

"Sorry Bishop, he often gets like this with Drew." She offered with an apologetic smile.

"Hmm . . . I'm sure he has his reasons, but he's not as gruff or cynical like he used to be."

She glanced at Cedric, catching a glimpse of his back as he rounded the corner going behind the hearth, they had all suffered losses. She was sure somewhere out there, Drew had a family of his own that was searching for him. She just hoped that Cedric didn't get too attached to their little foster family. They would have to part eventually.

oooOoooOoooOooo

He hated being cooped up all the time. He hated not being able to walk the way he wanted. He sure as hell didn't understand why his head felt so light or why his chest hurt every time he touched the plait of hair on the right side of his head that stopped in the center of his chest. He had gotten defensive when Shalita had offered to trim it like she had done for the rest but the unevenness reminded him of how he didn't belong there or anywhere for that matter. He felt that if he stayed here, got too close to anyone, something bad would happen.

"Like it always did . . . " He blinked, stunned by his own words and sat up from where he was leaning against the palm tree. He grimaced; the shadow of the tree had kept the ground moist which was more than evident on his backside. His brows scrunched together as he took in his surroundings and sighed when his cane somehow ended up a good foot away.

He continued to grimace, the pain in his back reminding him of the wounds there as he pushed himself up on his hands and knees. He swallowed, determined not to let the pain win out as he made his way over to his cane. This wasn't the first time he came out of fugue or one of his moods as Alice called them in another place. At least this time he hadn't woken up in a pool of his own blood. A chill went up his spin at the waking memory. It always left him feeling so uneasy, he couldn't remember what happened or what he did while he was in that state but he remembered more of his childhood when he came out of it.

'Maybe that's because of the kids.' He decided he'd ask Cedric about it later. Doctor Campbell often avoided him when he didn't have to do mandatory checkups or supervise him in the gym so there would be no asking him. He tried hanging out with the other teens but a boy named Andy made it a point to alienate him whenever the others would include him in a game they were playing or come and visit him in his room that had become the terrible threesome's (T3's) headquarters. He smirked against the pain, panting as he reached out for his cane. Tamara, Inari (not Giichi like he originally thought but the boy told him he didn't mind it if it was only him who said it and beamed at him when he called him 'G' instead) and Emy included him in everything and never treated him like an invalid. Their constant presence as well as that of the four friends was a blissful reprieve from the rectangular, plastered walls that made up his world the first couple weeks he'd been conscious.

Duo whooped in accomplishment that was soon followed by a surprised yelp when he was suddenly hefted up and over a broad shoulder.

"Ow! No, Ced!" He whined watching his cane fall back to the soggy earth. He pummeled Cedric's chest with his fists half-heartedly, "Put me down you dork! I can walk!"

"Knuckle head you're bleeding through my shirt. Walking would open them up more." Cedric growled out.

"And tossing me over your shoulder is any better?!" He countered, pouting. He was sure that he hadn't been bleeding.

Cedric glared, smirking at Duo's surprised gasp when he swooped down to pick up the cane. "It's better." He put the cane between his legs and reached up to re-situated Duo on his shoulder.

"Your bony shoulder is putting a hole in my stomach." Duo complained.

"You're one to talk, needle knees. Be grateful your perch is my shoulder and I'm not carrying you under my arm." Cedric said with a laugh, his anxiety melting away as he walked back to the pool. "You're not bleeding all that badly but you did ruin my shirt." He offered with a smile.

Duo pouted, sticking out his bottom lip trying to look as miserable as he felt. "I'm not no freakin' parrot." He grumbled.

Cedric smirked at the double negative. "Aw, Polly wanna cracker?"

Duo turned his head away, folding his arms and would have fallen off the older man's shoulder if Cedric hadn't been quick to steady him. Cedric snickered as Duo continued to pout, though he couldn't keep it up long. He recalled Cedric's sorrowful comment among the teasing and he couldn't help his relief that the bleeding wasn't as bad as Cedric had made it sound at first. The last time something like that happened, Cedric had been the one to find him, clean and patch him up since the good doctor was no where to be found. He glanced at Cedric through the corner of his eyes and smiled mischievously.

Alice was still standing by Bishop when Cedric waved to her.

"I got him. Brat was playing in the mud. 'E said something 'bout making mud pies." Cedric said laughingly, pulling Duo's arms forward when the shouldered teen tried to elbow him in the face and turned around so the mud on Duo's backside and legs could be seen. Duo ducked his head at the answering laughter and muttered under his breath.

"Eh? What was that, Kid? I didn't hear you."

"I was going to wait but I changed my mind. I said you'll pay for this!" Duo pushed himself up on Cedric's shoulder and wrapped his legs around his waist, laughing as he ruffled Cedric's short black hair, noticing the odd dusty brown hairs that were starting to appear in Cedric's hair. He pulled on it unintentionally a few times when Cedric threatened to lose his balance to make him find it again.

Everyone at the pool was laughing in varying degrees as Duo continued his revenge. Cedric swore at the imp on his back who continued assault, which he considered a super noogie. "Ah! Shit Kid! Fucking-"

"Cedric, your language!" Alice said between laughs.

"Yah! Pile on Cedric!"

"Race ya!"

"No fair! You're closer!"

Inari stuck out his tongue at Tamara, speeding up into a full run when Emy ran past him.

"No running on the deck! Boys! Tamara!" Bishop shouted half heartedly when they collided with Cedric's legs and he went down.

"Timber!" Hank shouted.

"Argh! Hank! Hey I could use a little help here!"

"Haha, I'm not touching that. Besides, my hands are full." He smirked, rubbing Shalita's jean clad butt.

Shalita slapped his backside and he held her closer to him. She smiled up at him as his lips met hers.

"Ewww!" Came the united response intermixed with giggles.

"Hank's got Shalita cooties!" Came the sing song comment from the edge of the pool along with more laughter and a few comments from teens, mostly telling them to shut up.

"Ha! You can't hold me, not when my man G has my back!" Duo's laughter came to an abrupt end, his smile wobbling with the sudden ache in his head. He shook it off and smiled showing all his teeth when he saw Hank and Shalita doing the tongue tango. "'Bout time you kissed her!" Duo shouted, his bravado coming back and wolf whistled at the kissing couple who smiled into their kiss. Inari proceeded to make loud kissing sounds with his hand and Duo stopped him by tickling him.

"Oh really?" Cedric queried, freeing himself of Inari and Tamara and heading to where Duo was mercilessly tickling Inari.

"Drew! Inari! Look out! He got away!" Tamara squealed and then screamed when Cedric swooped down on the unsuspecting duo. More chaos ensued when Emy and Tamara scrambled up to their feet and chased after him.

Shalita laughed, pulling away from her husband who was determined not to end their lip lock session. She rested her head against his chest, opening her eyes to frown at Maggie still standing beside them, looking wistfully at everyone else. Shalita touched her shoulder, smiling into olive shaped brown eyes that rose to her in question. "Hey, not going to help them capture Cedric?"

Maggie gazed over at Cedric who was grumbling with Inari and Duo captured under each arm as he attempted to walk toward them with Tamara and Emy on each leg. She smiled then quickly covered it with a scowl. "No, I'm just making sure they don't get into troub-"

Shalita and Maggie both glared at Hank when Maggie was suddenly shoved forward.

"Hank," Shalita warned.

Hank rolled his eyes."Be a kid, Kid. You don't have to act all grown up all the time."

"I have to with Cedric looking after us."

"What was that?"

She screamed when she was suddenly picked up and swirled around in the air, her surprise giving way to laughter before they all collapsed into a pile of limbs at Bishop's feet.

Alice smiled at them, pulling Duo up to her side. She was surprised that none of them had fallen into the pool yet.

Duo nodded his thanks to her, panting but content and exhausted. It would have been really bad for his back if Alice hadn't stepped in and pulled him out of the fray at the last minute. 'Maybe I pushed it too much.' He looked longingly around the pool, the happy faces as a melancholy creased his lips. He couldn't hear their laughter anymore, 'I want to stay out here. Please, just a little wh-'

Alice stumbled in surprise as she shifted Duo to her arms and kneeled down on the patio. "Drew," she called gently, brushing his long bangs from his flushed face and wiping away the tears at the corners of his eyes. A hand on her shoulder had her look up to Hank who waved away Bishop to keep attention in their direction to a minimum.

"I'll take him. No need to get Cedric worried again." She glanced up to see Shalita nod to her somehow holding the clothes Cedric had balled up under his arm earlier. She nodded back, letting Duo's hand slip from hers as Hank lifted him and took him away.

oooOoooOoooOooo

He groaned and wondered why they were being so loud. He turned over and put the pillow over his head.

"That's not answering my question."

"Cedric."

"No Alice, you said it yourself. You saw it. Despite his spells he was getting better and stronger. A little rough housing wouldn't take him down."

"Oh and that's your _expert_ opinion."

They weren't actually that loud. Their voices were muffled by the door, but he could hear them well. Right down to the shift of their feet against the floor. That was one of the things he discovered about himself, he had excellent senses. Duo blinked up at the shadowed ceiling. It was already nightfall.

"Doctor." He could hear the warning in Alice's tone.

"No, it's my personal observation." He could picture Cedric's rigid/stiff posture and agitated expession.

"Then your input is just that, an observation. As his doctor I'm better aware of his condition than you are no matter how impressive your _guess_ work and observations were before I got here. I'd suggest you be concerned about your own health."

"Wha-"

"It's nothing Alice. We'll talk about it later. Right now I want Dr. Campbell to tell me about Drew's condition."

"I don't have to tell you anything. You are not his biological family."

Duo heard nothing from them for a while, the snide remark from the Doctor hurt him as much as he was sure it had Cedric, but it was the truth. 'It had been nice pretending.' He didn't mind belonging somewhere and being a part of someone's family. 'Family . . . ' His mind felt sluggish and then . . . he wasn't sure where he was.

"I became his guardian when he was brought here and I still am regardless of blood. Now you damn well better tell me everything. And I _mean_ everything."

He felt like he was forgetting something. 'I have to go meet . . .' Duo rolled out of bed and limped toward the terrace doors using the wall as his support. The door was already open but he didn't notice it, walking slowly along the terrace. His room was at the far right end near the garden, but he paid no attention to the beautiful oasis and pushed onward. He made it down the first set of stairs before falling down them the rest of the way. He coughed and got up again with a pained grunt. 'I fucked up the mission . . . don't need him to come rescue me.'

oooOoooOoooOooo

A shadowed figure sitting in a patio chair started from his trance like state focused on the shimmering surface of the pool. He observed the T-shirt and boxer clothed youth sway dangerously toward the pool and then knock over several chairs before colliding with the wall. He winced sympathetically and sat up when the boy kept moving forward. The chair creaked under him at his slight movement and he held his breath when the boy stopped.

The observer checked his visibility, noting the position of the moon and the boy's position. He kept his breathing shallow, mindful of the last time he'd happened upon the boy in this state. The cuts on his side ached in remembrance. The moon was full but the chilled air kept many of the Inn's inhabitants inside. He grumbled, forgetting himself, about the unfairness of being the one to get pool duty. He pursed his lips in annoyance. The boy started moving again with a more noticeable limp. The observer wondered what he was trying to get away from as he walked without masking his steps toward the boy laboring against the wall.

"Hmm, you need to get somewhere in a hurry?" He queried watching the boy stumble onward, mumbling under his breath. He tried again. "Drew was it? It's not the best idea to go off on your own wearing only that." The man gestured towards Duo's lack of clothing then ran his hand through his short blonde hair and cursed, things were not going to go as he had hoped in the beginning.

He grabbed Duo's arm, tense and ready for anything the boy would throw at him, pulling him from the wall. He looked at the boy in mild shock. He hadn't expected this outcome. Duo was like a rag doll in his hand, his shoulder length hair spilling over his face and his too big shirt sliding off of one pale shoulder.

He glanced around, looking up in the direction of the boy's room on the terrace when he heard voices from above. He picked up Duo, glaring when he saw the light spill onto the terrace and he ran into the building. He couldn't let Cedric see him with Duo, he stuffed the long limbed boy into a connecting side closet, briefly looking around to see if anyone had seen him before he running back outside. He ended his mad dash in a calm walk to stand collected at the pool's edge.

He lit a cigar and took a long draw of it. He let the clove mix fill him and then exhaled the smoke out languidly as he listened to the voices up above. "3... 2... 1." He whispered, repeating his earlier actions.

"D!"

"Cedric! You're going to wake everyone up. Calm down. Fred?" She admonished in a harsh whisper.

He looked up at the cute red head with a bar piercing in her left eyebrow and waved. "What's wrong?"

"Is Drew down there?" He watched Alice look at Cedric incredulously.

"There's no way he could have made it down there from here." She said crossing her arms and looking at the thirteen-foot drop then over at the barely visible stairs.

Fred scratched his head and glanced around the area. "No one's come through the door or down the stairs, but I'll check the pool house to be sure."

"Thanks." He smirked when Alice blushed and started to pull Cedric away from the railing. "C'mon, he's probably wandering around inside. Don't go yelling at Doctor Campbell, he wouldn't know where Drew went because we were both coming to check on him."

"Fred, what's all the commotion?"

Fred clasped Tom's arm so they were elbow to elbow in greeting and released him with a clap on his shoulder. "Cedric's brother wandered off again."

"Oh?" Fred gave Tom an inquisitive look but Tom ignored the question there. "You can tell him that the boy didn't come downstairs and Andy didn't have anything to do with it this time."

"Kay." He shrugged, making a show of checking the pool house before going to the only lit, open room at 2:32 in the morning. He kept close to the rail and watched as Tom began the first check around the pool's perimeter. He cursed when he realized he forgot about the chairs Duo had knocked over. 'We can't afford any slip-ups, not like the last time.' He leaned over the rail and smiled in relief. Tom righted them with a shake of his head and went toward the garden. Fred walked into the only room with the terrace doors open, noting that the closet and bathroom doors were wide open before continuing to the hall where he heard startled hushed, sounds.

'I wonder if he checked under the beds too.' He mused, catching up to a very frustrated looking Alice who was pulling a stiff looking Cedric away from another door.

"He didn't slip behind me to the pool house and Tom said that no one was on his end or the lower level." Fred offered a contrite smile wondering if Alice would get him under control before he woke everyone in the Inn.

Alice gave him a grateful look, startled when Cedric abrupt/suddenly jerked out of her hands. Fred watched the doctor sidled up behind him.

"No! We need to . . ."

"You need to be more concerned about yourself." Doctor Campbell stepped away from Cedric when Cedric's hand whipped out toward him.

"Cedric!" Fred went to her side when she crumpled to the floor with Cedric half out of her arms. Alice glared at the smug looking Doctor who replaced the safety cap back on the needle and put it in his pants pocket where it clanked with something else. "Do you always carry such strong sedatives on you Doctor?"

"As a Doctor, one must be prepared for any given situation. It is for his own good."

"What's wrong with him?" Alice demanded.

Doctor Campbell stared at the wall, a smirk fixed on his kindly, aged face. "I'm not at liberty to say. Perhaps when he wants you to know he'll tell you." He narrowed his eyes at Fred and turned his back on Alice when she started to protest. "You should take him to his room. The boy won't turn to dust if he's left alone for a night."

"Doctor-" She frowned at Fred, pulling her hand away from his and then glared at him when he stopped her from pursuing the doctor.

"He's not looking too well."

She nodded and let Fred help her get him to his room.

"Do you need anything else? I can wa-"

"No, I'll be staying here for a bit."

"Thanks." Fred heard through the door after he closed it. He went downstairs and paused in thought on the bottom stair. He looked around, shook his head as if disagreeing with someone and then smiled as he made his way back to the pool.

Tbc...


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimers: I garner no profit from this fic. I don't own nor did I create the GW universe, I'm simply letting my imagination have its wicked way with the characters therein.

Warnings: Angst, AU, Duo torture, language

Pairings: 1+2, 1+R, 3+4, 5xS, eventual 1x2, 3x4

AN: Refund... sorry, all purchases are final

Here's the rest, unbeta'd.

Feedback is appreciated.

Wasurenai yo

by priscel

Seven

He was warm, uncomfortably so. He threw off the covers and tried to roll his aching body over to a cooler side of the bed but his braid was caught on something . . . no, under that something. He rolled back and tugged at his braid. His hand grasped for something thicker but what he came across was much smaller.

'Two inches wide, one inch thick,' he did the measurements without thinking, a grimace beginning to show on his face.

'Plait,' he corrected himself with a bitter tone as he groggily pushed at the warm, malleable thing in front of him. It groaned. Duo blinked open sleep heavy eyes to see a muscled back and a blond head of hair with dark roots. He jerked back and cringed, biting his lip and gingerly rubbing at the side of his head, 'Damn plait.'

Duo soon stopped his rubbing the side of his head and watched the steady rise and fall of the man's sides, keeping his eyes from wandering down the man's hip where his shifting had caused the sheets to leave him bare. He didn't want the visual confirmation of what he brushed up against while he slept. He gently pushed on the man's back and slowly began to pull his plait free. He let go of the breath he'd been holding silently once his plait was loose but his teeth worried his bottom lip.

He stared at his fingertips in the dimly lit room and rubbed them together. He knew that this was his chance to escape. He stretched his legs and winced at the pain that raced up his side, but unfortunately it seemed he'd have to limp as fast as he could to get out of the room. He glanced back at the man's back, his fingers following and ghosting over the dozens of scars that only would have been noticed by touch. He withdrew his hand, damning his curosity as he pulled his plait over his shoulder and rolled over to inch toward the edge of the bed in hopes of not disturbing its other occupant.

He found it hard to hear over the frantic thrum of his heart as he neared the edge of the bed. Duo's body tensed before he felt the puffs of breath against the back of his neck. "Didn't they ever tell you to never turn your back on the enemy?"

"Mmph!" A hand covered his mouth and nose while the other slipped around his waist, dragging him back against the blond haired man.

Fred pressed his cheek to the side of Duo's face to keep the boy from getting enough leverage to head butt him even though Duo seemed more concerned about pulling his hand away from his nose. He wrestled with him for a few minutes as the deceivingly frail looking boy put up more of a struggle then he had anticipated. He held Duo tighter as the boy's body jerked in demand for air. Soon Fred made a sound of disappointment once Duo's hands dropped away from his, twitching reflexively toward his face. He removed his thumb and index finger from over Duo's nose, other than feeling the instinctual draws of gasping breath over his fingers the boy didn't move.

"It's hard to believe that you're one of them." He sat up on his elbow and turned Duo around to meet thick lashed, violet slits that glared hate. He barely had time to react to the open, scarred palm that shot up toward his nose. He swallowed, jerking the thin wrist away from his face, all too aware of the result of taking a heel to the nose at that speed.

"That's more like it." He wrenched Duo's other bandaged hand forward and held them together as he stared down at the boy whose eyes gradually widen in disbelief as fear slowly bled into them. 'This might work out better than I'd hoped.' He smiled and the boy shrunk back into the bed tugging at his trapped hands.

"Now if you promise not to scream or do anything to bring unnecessary attention to us, I'll let you go. This is not at all what you think it is, alright?"

Fred watched as Duo nodded stiffly, a distrustful frown marring the pleasant face he'd seen unconscious on countless occasions.

"So why am I here?" Duo rubbed his wrists, feeling the ache from the bruises to come with a thoughtful look on his face.

Fred smiled salaciously at the boy when he remained where he was. "Straight to the point I see. Are you sure you don't want to indulge in this scenario . . . We wake up, have a little rough sex where you play the virgin?"

Duo looked at him as if he'd grown another head and moved away when the older man leaned down as if to kiss him. Fred chuckled, propping himself up against the headboard and let eyes linger on Duo's blushing face even after Duo looked away. "You look too much like bait anyway."

"Then we . . . I mean we didn't . . . " Duo gestured nervously toward Fred's lack of clothes and his missing shorts, flushing red and pulling the sheet and his shirt toward his lap. The answering laugh from the older man had Duo glaring at him one second and averting his eyes the next, his hands fisted the sheets as he reminded himself that he wouldn't see anything if he just kept his back turned.

"No," he chuckled, noting the boy didn't seem to remember being restrained by him, "You're an exhibitionist in your sleep." He said huskily as Duo hunkered down in his shirt. He couldn't help teasing the boy when he left himself open for it. "You might wanna stop that."

"What? Shit!" Duo floundered, whipping back around in a jerk that set off the quiet ache to a painful throb in his back.

"That." Fred laughed at Duo's effort to reign in the blush that was steadily taking over his face. "Well that's what usually happens when one person hogs the covers: one of us ends up . . . naked. And if you get any redder," he poked Duo in the shoulder. "You'll probably pass out and . . . " he leaned in closer, speaking again with a husky tone that held a distinctive Russian accent, "then I'll have to resuscitate you. Now they can't prosecute me for performing CPR."

"Get some clothes on!" Duo threw a pillow at him, pulling his knobby knees to his chest and yanking his shirt down over them. He ignored the ache from his back though it served as a reminder to his healing body that it shouldn't be responding even if he didn't notice yet. Duo wrapped an arm around his shirt-covered knees, determined on staying in that position or least he see more of what he didn't want to see. Well not really, his eyes itched to peek back at what the man so willing showed and he closed his eyes against it. The man was sexy in his nakedness with the remnants of a baby face broadened by age. Duo caught himself peeking and felt more heat suffuse his cheeks as he squeezed his eyes shut.

Fred caught the pillow, laughing at how the boy reacted. "It's my room," he grinned as he put the pillow down.

"Then why am I here?!" Duo grumbled out, jerking at his shirt once more.

Fred smirked, tossing Duo his shorts from under the sheets. "Relax Drew. You must've kicked them off in your sleep. It's expected since they're too big for you. As for why you are here instead of your room, I was on pool duty and I found you in the storage closet."

Fred shrugged to himself, though immensely amusing there was the no point in making the boy more anxious than he already was. Really, the boy only had to be breathing to serve his purpose. He paused at the momentary regret he felt, "I didn't know where your room was and I didn't feel like talking to your overprotective sibling." He left it at that getting out of bed and bending over to retrieve a cigar from his discarded breeches. There was no need for modesty, it was his room after all.

He twirled the cigar between his fingers as he watched the boy bashfully pull the shorts off his head and shuck his long legs into them. He crushed the expensive import, kicking his pants in frustration from the middle of the floor to the bed, seeing his thoughts for what they were. It had been nice having another body in bed with him, to wake up with and talk to without any one-night awkwardness. Was he really that lonely? Alex had been careless with both their lives. If he had only listened to him, then maybe they would still have had each other.

He let go of his wistful thoughts and focused on the here and now. The people at the Inn had been willing to accept his sob story that he was searching for his sister, who he offered up a picture of and was currently studying in Italy- one of the places missed by the falling debris. He laid low and watched the boy currently sitting on his bed for over a month. Duo had struggled despite the limits set by the drugs and being alienated by kids his age and it had endeared him to him.

He looked at his ruined cigar, 'I could keep him and kill the others.' He smiled to himself, glancing at the boy and feeling the subsequent tug in response . . . that had nice possibilities. With a lighter step and warmth coiling in his lower regions, he went to the bathroom. "I'm going to take a shower. If you want one, you are welcome to join me."

"You said I was jail bait."

"I'll just tell them you molested me."

"What!?" Duo choked, turning around to see the wide grin on the man's square face. The older man wagged a brown brow and Duo collapsed on the bed, laughing himself to tears. "You think . . . me . . . and they'd . . . " He continued to laugh and Fred disappeared into the bathroom with the door half open.

Duo sat up, wiping the tears from his eyes, "You're a freakin' lunatic."

"Just Fred's fine." Fred called out, his amusement clear over the running water of the shower. "I don't mind if you keep me company, just make sure to tell your psychotic keeper that I didn't kidnap you."

Duo cursed and looked around the room. "Did I bring my cane with me?"

"What?"

"My cane?" Duo shouted.

"Dunno, _Duo_, I found you in the closet remember." Fred snickered and Duo glared at the bathroom in question of its occupant. Duo shook his head and looked out the window, 'First floor.'

It was morning, he could tell that much from the sun's position as he stumbled to the door and braced himself against the pain. He winced, hobbling out into the hall toward the main lobby and noticed the beginnings of bruising around his wrists and other small ones along his legs and on his arms. He kept going, if the guy had used him in that way, there would've been pain but there was none. By the time he got to the entryway, he was panting with a pleased smirk cutting through the pain. He knew he probably looked like an idiot just standing there and smiling, but he couldn't help it. It felt good that the usual fatigue he experienced doing anything more than the Doctor said was gone.

He wished the same was true for the pain but _God didn't create the world in a day._ His smirk wobbled, he remembered a kind person saying that to him once. He knew he'd get better but the time it took to get there was what got him. _The impatience of youth . . . _He turned his head in confusion, he was sure he'd heard someone speak.

'God didn't create the world in a day,' he leaned against the wall thinking as his lips mouthed the words. He had been told those kind words by his father. He shook his head, 'not my Father . . . Father Maxwell had said that.'

His face scrunched up in pain and he rested the side of his aching head against the cool wall as an image and memories followed the thought out name. He struggled to stay upright and his eyes went round at the devastation that followed that stable and content moment in his life. His throat constricted from the flood of emotions that came next, making his mouth open as if to scream but he choked on it instead. His eyelids drooped and his head fell forward as he leaned heavily on his shoulder against the wall.

'Solo.' Another person, an older brother he'd lost, along with their gang. He stared at the floor beneath his bare feet and watched as splotches of water appeared. Duo wiggled his toes when several drops fell on his feet. 'Warm. Why's it raining inside?' He wondered, raising his head to feel two warm streams running down his face.

He rubbed them away, surprised by the heat in his face. He closed his eyes trying to hold back the tears even though his eyes ached to spill them. Haunting green eyes, lacking any sort of demarcation that hinted if it was human or any animal he'd seen, filled his mind's eye. He unconsciously reached out to it, 'Death Scythe. My -'

"Bye!"

"Thank you."

"Bye-bye Bee."

"Take care Embelli."

"We're going home, Alice!"

"Good. I don't have to worry about you guys eating up all my sweets," came the familiar grumble.

They were coming from the lobby. 'Did someone leave the TV on?' He wondered as he listened, it was rare that people watched it in the Inn because it- more often than not with its news of 'the crisis,' photos and grief stricken faces -brought down their spirits. Through the murmur of their voices, he heard a procession of shuffling feet headed to and out the doors of the Inn.

'Home?' he frowned, his melancholy mood deepening. He pulled himself up from his downward slump as his legs continued to do their best impression of jello. After getting his knees to lock, he peeked around the corner. There was a potted fern in his line of sight that kept him hidden from view as he watched Hank leaning against the reception desk and Alice standing next to Bishop who had his hand extended.

"Mr. Harden."

"Bishop, please, only the children call me that."

A tall man, though that was debatable since even Duo seemed tall in comparison to Bishop, with the Preventers' insignia on his shirt shoulders smiled, shaking Bishop's hand with both of his. "Bishop, thank you for housing-"

"Please, no thanks needed. We only did what anyone would do."

"Not everyone would sir." Another Preventer said in passing.

"The families of these people will be relieved to have them back with them." The Preventer held his tongue, not wanting to dampen the mood with the reminder of their losses.

Duo observed most of the people he'd seen at the pool say their good-byes to Bishop, Hank and Alice. He looked away, why wouldn't they be happy? All of this had been an unreal camping trip to most of them who had homes, if not family to go back to. People were looking for them; they were missed. He entertained the thought of joining them, walking with them to be a part of the leaving group even if it meant he met with reality at the end of the ride. They'd realize he had no place to go, no family, no home. He remembered a man with a whack hairdo and another who had a hundred kinds of hawaiian shirts but wore only three of them. Though he knew their faces, he was doubtful that they would be as easy to find just by picking up the phone book.

"We'll be back to check on you. Mr. Warrington, are you sure about your wife sir? And that other young man-"

"Cedric, he should be fine if it is just exhaustion as Dr. Campbell says it is." Duo saw something unspoken pass between them. "I doubt Shalita would let you take her to a hospital, even if I threw her over my shoulder and handcuffed her to the backseat, she'd still refuse to go... maybe once things die down."

The Preventer nodded with a whimsical smile on his face. Duo listened to them without really hearing them, 'They didn't . . . ?' He shook his head. It didn't matter that they hadn't mentioned him. He wasn't going to be staying there much longer.

"Well, if it's not too much to ask . . . Could you let us know about Tamara?" He heard Alice ask as he snuck behind the counter in a low crouch then sidled into the corridor that lead to several rooms on that floor, one of which belonged to Cedric.

oooOoooOoooOooo

He entered the quiet room that was very similar to his own except it had only one window and uncarpeted floors. He limped into the room and braced himself on the back of the chair that he was sure that Alice had spent the night sleeping in. He pushed it closer to the bed, turning it so he could lean over the back and sat down with a relieved breath as he rubbed agitatedly at his left hip and side. Worried violets panned over his sleeping guardian and dwelled on the discoloration in bushy brows. He wondered if Cedric even knew that whatever it was that was afflicting him had spread to underneath his hair.

"Seeing you like this, makes this one hell of a day," he said with false bravado and a wry grin. "I th-think this is where everyone ends up . . . " he breathed the words as he stared at the man's sleeping face.

"Ced, aren't you the one whose supposed to be visiting me?" Duo gave Cedric a watery smile as he took Cedric's hand and swiped his wet cheeks against his shoulders. He thought he had the waterworks under control. He squeezed his eyes shut then blinked several times, trying to dispel the ache in his lids, 'it feels like I have hundreds of needles in my eyes.' "What's going on with you?"

"You may not feel it but he burnt up his hands back . . . when he went home."

He realized, belatedly, that he had left the door open. Duo didn't turn to her, resting his head on his arm as he let his fingers trace the too smooth skin and brownish pink marks that went up Cedric's forearms. The scars were darker on the inside of his arms, suggesting that something really hot landed there or he had held it. "Is he going to be alright?" Her silence made Duo anxious. Alice must have seen it in his face because he jerked when she laid a comforting hand on his shoulder.

Alice kneaded the stiff muscle of his shoulder before she ran her hand over the top of his head and smiled sadly down at Cedric. The pet was something she often did to comfort him when he had these fugues, but it was hard to accept it because he always felt like her dog or something. "I dunno. I suggested that it could have been related to that condition they were talking about on radio, Fume fever, but Doctor Campbell dismissed it saying his _apprentice_ worked too much. The Preventer's medical officer agreed after he examined him and said that it was unlikely Cedric's condition was related to those cases because of the timing, that the symptoms for Fume fever would've shown up a week after exposure to the crash site if not sooner."

She shook her head, "the medical officer diagnosed it was the flu and exhaustion. He was barely able to prescribe bed rest with some cold medicine before Doctor Campbell carted him off to check on Shalita."

Duo blinked up at the disdain he heard in her voice as she went to the other side of Cedric's bed and studied the medicine the Doctor had left behind. Even though it sounded like her bitter words were meant for Shalita, they weren't.

"Drew, don't take any of the medicine he gave you." He heard her mutter as she put the bottle in the bottom drawer, it sounded half-hearted, like an afterthought that reminded her he was still in the room. He watched her cross her arms over her stomach and hug herself as if she was cold. "It all matches up with the reported cases of Fume fever. I should have known- paid more attention to what he _wasn't_ doing. The day of the Barton Coup, Cedric dropped me off at home and then headed to his place. I- my family was fortunate, at least on this end. They didn't know that I was coming home for Christmas had already left town for our usual family reunion in North Dakota. I-I was a mess, I heard over the TV what was happening when they started advising everyone to seek cover. It was the next day when I made my way back to Cedric."

She broke off, her hand covering her mouth. Duo lowered his eyes, he wasn't sure if he wanted to hear this. His newly recovered memories were still so fresh on his mind that he thought he could smell the smoke, see the charred flesh and taste the ashes in his throat. He ran his thumb over the back of Cedric's hand, tracing the healing burn scars there that he hadn't seen earlier.

Alice made an odd sound in her throat, lost in the memory, blind to his actions. "H-he had dug them out and the smell . . . God I dunno how he did what he did, but he had the shredded remains of a shirt wrapped around his hands when I found him rocking his brother." She swallowed thickly with a slight cough, "His skin was pink and almost too hot to touch and their home was still burning . . . I had to fight him to get him to leave."

Duo squeezed his eyes shut and tried to ignore the gritty taste in his mouth. There wasn't anything there. He was here . . . right? "Why didn't you tell them to take him? Tell them about his hair?" At her blank look, he pointed to Cedric's full head of black hair, forgetting that what he'd seen was underneath it all. He forced himself to breathe normally and tried to focus on something else.

He ran his thumb over the too smooth skin, there wasn't anything else in the room that would be a good focal point. He didn't want to remember. Duo examined the scarred hand in his and talked past the tightness in his throat. "Why is he still here?" It was little more than a whisper but Alice was more there with him than before. "Why is he still here like-like _this_ when he could have been taken to a hospital?" His voice firming, he hadn't been able to do anything for them then, but they could now. His emotions were a garbled mess of anger, hurt and helplessness that left him unable to distinguish the past from the present.

Duo could smell it, an acrid scent that lingered in his lungs long after he'd exhaled. And in that instant he could feel her body become limp as she, like everyone else he had ever cared for, left him behind.

Alice stepped back from the bed, stunned by Duo's heated gaze for a moment before her lips pursed into a frown. Duo didn't look right, his eyes held a look that said he'd seen far too much. Those hard, dead eyes showed nothing of the loud, boisterous, smiling boy that they'd known for the past few months. Out of curiosity, she shifted and shuddered at the lazy way his eyes tracked her movement while the rest of him remained perfectly still.

"Drew?" She hadn't meant to whisper his name but there was not even a hint of recognition in his eyes and his hollow laugh made her shudder.

"Drew?" She tried again, shaking off the fear that he was invoking in her.

"Everyone dies."

It sounded like a threat at first that made her want to push him away from Cedric as if separating them would buy them some time. But Cedric wasn't dying, as far as she could tell and she wasn't going to think otherwise.

'They came and with the right medicine Cedric can be helped.' She had pocketed the medicine the Preventer left and she used that to ground herself. Alice stared at Duo, deciding it wasn't a threat. It was a heart wrenching loneliness, drenched in so much despair and resignation that it hurt to hear it come from someone so young. It made her wonder how he'd coped in the past. 'Was he reliving some memory?'

"I'm always left behind."

Whatever it was, she didn't like it. "Drew?" She called to him more firmly.

"Everyone dies." She'd crossed the short distance between them and let her hand fly.

Duo heard the smack more than he felt it. He blinked up at her as she towered over him in confusion. "It slipped my mind to mention his eyebrows were not some bad dye job because I was too preoccupied with trying to find the person he was most concerned about."

He flinched at the verbal slap; it hurt more than the physical blow she'd dealt him. He hadn't meant to accuse her of doing nothing. His attention returned to Cedric at the feel of pressure on his hand.

"I didn't want to go, Vic. I couldn't leave you there." Cedric said weakly trying to sit up, Duo looked at him in confusion.

"Cedric," Alice chided gently, pushing him back down on the bed. "That was his brother's name." She whispered as she pulled the sheet back up to his chest not looking directly at Duo but at their joined hands.

tbc . . .


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimers: I garner no profit from this fic. I don't own nor did I create the GW universe, I'm simply letting my imagination have its wicked way with the characters therein.

Warnings: Angst, AU, Duo torture, language

Pairings: 1+2, 1+R, 3+4, 5xS, eventual 1x2, 3x4

AN: Long awaited update, and a lengthy one at that.

Feedback is appreciated.

Wasurenai yo

by priscel

eight

Daylight gave way to the azure hues of the evening sky. The Inn came alive with sounds other than those made by its occupants, with the creaking stairs, groaning metal and closing doors even though there was no one there. Bishop had told them what to expect now that the Inn was fairly empty and sounds of the Inn adjusting to temperature shifts could be clearly heard. Duo shifted at the creak from the stairs, usually that meant someone was coming down them but he didn't see anyone. He went back to his exploration of the large laundry basket of items that had been left behind in the rooms and added to the faded basket over time. Bishop had told them that it had once belonged to a hippie family who'd disappeared in the mountains and that the basket had been thrown away, burnt and stolen many times (though none of them believed that last part because of its gaudy, muted-green color) but always could be found holding the forgotten items.

"Bishop can sure spin tales," Duo snorted and jumped at the loud clack from the den behind him. He peered into the den where the TV was off and saw no other movement. No one was there but him on the floor in front of the reception desk surrounded by half the contents of the large laundry basket. He settled back into his scavenger hunt when silence answered his tensed frame.

Luckily for Duo, there were enough odds and ends/hand-me downs left behind that he could dress warmly and not look like a waif in the process. He tugged the black sweater over his head with a wince. He shook it off, holding tightly to the feeling that he was making the right decision. How light he felt even though his back felt like someone had took a machete to it and then there was his hip. He stood up, wriggling his bare toes peeking out from beneath the dusty brown cargo pants he wore. He shifted his weight from one leg to the other, wincing at the bone deep ache on his left side. He slipped on some socks and was putting on too big shoes when a hand descended on his head and slowly almost carefully stroked his head as if he were someone's precious pet. He fisted his hands against the urge to knock the hand off and growled, "Don't do that."

Hank laughed. "Wha? You don't like the _comforting_ touch?"

Duo shook off Hank's hand, glaring with a pout. "No, that's something Alice does. It always makes me feel like I'm being petted."

"Haha, and I betcha didn't know she calls you furball number two. Though I think you'd make a better Chihuahua." Hank said good naturedly, squeezing Duo's shoulder when Duo glowered at him. "You're a good kid. I knew that much from the get go." Hank added in a half whisper.

"Hm?" Duo gave him a confused look.

"Nothin'," Hank smiled with a shake of his wavy-fuzz covered head.

Duo glared at Hank's hand as he removed it from his shoulder on route to his head.

Hank laughed, putting his hands in his pockets instead, "Look, you should head back and have some diner. Alice said that Cedric will be coming down to join us. I have one more person to get."

Duo nodded, watching Hank disappear down the hall he had stumbled through earlier that day before pulling out the backpack full of goodies that he had unwittingly hidden beneath the clothes when he had begun his scavenging. Duo tied a coat around his waist and heard the clink of change in the pockets. He'd been surprised himself by the forgotten credits and pre-colony cents he'd found among the clothes. 'The style of clothing hasn't changed much since then,' he commented as he tossed a pair of ripped jeans back into the box. He really loved precolony stuff and couldn't help but wonder at his luck. The things he'd found would last him for a while and then the old money... once things got better he'd be able to have them appraised or auctioned. He shouldered his book bag, passing through the lobby to the stairwell and glimpsing a head of light blond hair before ascending the stairs. Once in his room, he closed the door for the last time. He locked it and took a look around as he pulled his shoulder length hair up into a ponytail, his eyes lingering on his bedside table where the hairties Tamara and Maggie had collected for him still sat. He pocketed a few of them before slipping out onto the terrace.

"Duo..." He heard the whisper, turning to face the stranger who spoke his name with such familiarity. He studied the shaggy haired teen watching him as if he'd seen a ghost, holding his right arm close to his side. 'Did they leave someone behind?' he wondered even though he didn't remember ever seeing the teen around the others and forgetting the fact that other teen had said his name which none of the others knew... that he hadn't known until a few hours ago. He looked him over again, this time taking in his clothing; he was wearing a dark blue shirt beneath a beat up jean jacket with similarly styled jeans that accentuated his thighs.

'I'm glad he didn't throw it away.' He thought eyeing the jacket even as his brows furrowed and his lazy grin vanished in the face of his confusion. 'Was that a memory? Do I know him?' his hand came up to cover the right side of his head, an aching throb was starting to develop beneath the scar over his right brow. He felt the words forming on the tip of his tongue. He didn't see the shaggy haired teen's movement until he was wrapped in the other boy's arms and hugged to the point of being crushed.

Duo couldn't breathe as fire laced up his back from the healing wounds that reopened. He struggled to get the shaggy haired teen to loosen his hold on him but it seemed pointless. He panted when air return to his lungs but he instantly froze when the other boy kissed him. He was surprised by the intensity of it. He was being held in a way he never believed would happen and was practically being devoured through the kiss. He was being smothered by someone who missed him. Someone he could almost remember and he didn't know if he wanted to remember not if it meant more pain. Duo's eyes burned from the tears prickling in them as the throb in his head grew and memories followed.

'This is too much,' he whimpered at the throbbing ache. Duo grabbed the over friendly teen's right hand as he shakily touched his face and ducked under it, wrenching it back and up between the shaggy haired teen's shoulders with a strength and speed that surprised even him.

There was something faintly familiar that whispered to him that this person was important. The other boy was half up on his toes, his back arched and taut as his body instinctively tried to relieve the pressure in his arm. The pain he saw in the boy's, now that he was closer, drawn face made him loosen his hold a little, he was still pissed. Duo leaned in close to the other teen's ear and panted, "No matter who the hell you think you are, don't act like you know me."

Duo felt the other teen stiffen as he looked back at him with a shocked expression. Duo saw it then, blue, the intense blue from his dreams currently resided in irises of the boy in front of him.

"Duo, you-" He didn't want to hear it not if it meant more painful memories. He pushed the boy forward with a twist and punched him in his solar plexus. The boy collapsed to his knees and Duo's hand went back up to his head. A flash of a memory- the messy haired boy unaffected by his fist and then darkness when the shaggy haired teen gave him a punch like the one he'd dealt him moments ago.

"Heero." Duo half breathed before covering his mouth, his body moving without him having to tell it to as he hobbled past the crouching teen and stumbled down the stairs towards the pool. He didn't look back as he made his way past the second hearth on the opposite side of the pool and out to the cars he'd seen at the back of the Inn. He stumbled around a palm tree and met a smiling Fred.

"Hey Honey, whatya say we runaway and get married?" Fred said in a singsong voice, holding one arm open for Duo to come in to and smiling as he put the cigar to his lips with the other.

"That's fine."

"We can even have 2.5 kids and a little place in the mountains." Fred said around his cigar before taking a final draw on it and crushing the lit end into the ground under his booted foot.

"Ok, let's go." Duo said his eyes darting around the area and not really paying attention to what Fred was saying.

"Hey, do you know what you just agreed to?" Fred was wearing overalls, his turtle neck sleeves rolled up to his biceps as he studied Duo's antsy movements.

Duo shifted his backpack, a light sheen of sweat on his face as he stared into dark brown eyes. "You're heading out right? Can't you take me with you?"

"They'll know you went with me and Cedric-"

"It doesn't matter." Duo gritted his teeth to fight off the dizziness. "Just... I can pay you."

Fred shook his head, running his hand through his spiked hair and smiled. "How can I refuse when you agreed to have my babies?"

"What?!" Duo sputtered his face flushing.

Fred laughed, taking Duo's backpack. "Come on sweetheart."

"I'm not your sweetheart." Duo followed with his hands in his pockets.

They came to a stop at a tinted windowed, dark green station wagon, opening the back where Duo watched Fred push stuff around, cover and uncover other things before tossing Duo's backpack over the backseat with a shrug of his shoulders.

"I have important stuff in there." Duo groused when he heard his backpack bounce and something crack when it hit the floor of the car.

"I'll replace it." Fred smirked at him, pulling the hood half down. "Get inside and make yourself comfortable. I gotta go get something from my room then we'll go."

Fred was off before Duo could warn him that Hank was probably still in the hall. Duo went to the passenger side and wondered if Fred had unlocked it when he heard it honk and the locks shift. He smiled; glad that he wouldn't have to stand out in the open. He didn't want that person, Heero, to find him. He didn't want any more painful memories. He didn't want to remember.

"Heero," he whispered to himself, liking the way the 'e's rolled into the 'r,' but unsure of the man himself. He sat down and felt the car bounce a little more than it should have from his weight alone.

Duo glanced at the rearview mirror and saw something move in the back of the car. He had lowered his foot quietly, preparing to sneak around to the back when the door slammed shut and Fred smiled at him in the mirror.

"I didn't think you'd still be here."

"We're still going?" Duo hurriedly pulled his leg inside when Fred came over and closed his door. He watched as the window lowered and Fred leaned on it, watching him.

"Yes, but I'm not intending to come back here. You sure you want to do this?" Fred smiled as Duo shifted in his seat and stole furtive glances at the Inn through the mirror.

"Yes," there was no hesitance in his answer.

Fred made as if he would shrug but leaned in kissing Duo's cheek before darting around and hopping into the driver's seat. "You're wish is my command, honey."

"I'm not your honey." Duo grumbled with lowered lashes, feeling oddly comfortable with the pretentious man.

"Hmm... So we're not a couple anymore? The shame! Let's see, you look like you're angry, did you know you're hot when you're angry." Fred smirked at Duo's arched brows, "Great you accepted my apology so that means we can go straight to the make up sex." Fred gave Duo a lecherous grin, holding back his laughter when Duo grumbled and turned away.

After a while on the road, Fred noticed how Duo gradually began to slump in his seat, his head resting against the side of the door as the wind blew his long bangs across his face. Duo's eyes were also half-closed though he could see those violet orbs shifting over the passing landscape. He didn't mind the peaceful moment, especially if it afforded him memories like this.

'Maybe nothing else mattered besides this,' he wondered, 'Could I start over and let everything else go?' He drove on, glancing at Duo who flinched when he hit a bump in the road that caused him to bump his head. He smiled as Duo invaded his glove compartment, he didn't get the reaction he had hoped for earlier. It was unnatural for the teen to be so still and quiet, at least judging by how he behaved when he wasn't drugged up. He smirked to himself, quickly replacing it with a serious look, "Hey, you look bored. I could pull over and you could- !"

The rolled-up papers met the side of his head as he laughed and swerved off of North Highway to the right. He glanced back with a smile when he saw that he hadn't missed the turn he was looking for. Duo swatted him again. "Ok, it was just a suggestion," he conceded in an amused grumble.

Satisfied, Duo smirked as he settled back into his seat and unrolled the wad of papers to see the business section of the Sunday paper from last year. He immersed himself in it, an occasional bump in the road rousing his eyes to take in the arid landscape as its conformation changed from ridged, desert terrain to scattered clumps of brush and green hilly ranges. Sitting and listening to the radio, Duo felt that from where he sat it really didn't seem like there was anything wrong with the world. He glanced up from his reading as he shuffled the paper to the Comics section and listlessly read a sign saying 'Welcome to Nevada' as it passed his window. "Where are we going?"

Fred quirked a brow in amusement, 'A little late now.' "I thought it didn't matter where I was taking you." Fred smiled at Duo's faint blush as he held his gaze, "Las Vegas then a little place called Las Cruces, New Mexico." Fred half turned in his seat, keeping an eye on the road. "I was serious about the marrying part and I just happen to know of a mountain home for sale in Las Cruces."

Duo blinked at him owlishly. "Wha-" he got out, coming out of his stupor even though a part of him said that it was ironic- him leaving Death Valley for Las Cruces. He found himself burging on a laugh when scuffing noises in the back had his brows bunching instead.

"And the doggie too?" The failed whisper caught the attention of both men.

"Shh."

Duo ignored the man in the driver's seat in favor of watching the moving lumps behind the backseat.

"Tamara?" Duo called back and Fred slowed and eventually pulled off the road to a sandy shoulder.

"Tamara, I know you're back there, who else is with you?"

"Sorry Drew."

Fred sighed, resting his head on the steering wheel for a dramatic effect, "And everything was going so well."

Duo glared at him and Fred smiled, that was one thing about him that annoyed Duo most- his false smiles. Duo glared, he didn't know how he could tell. And something was off about this whole thing, it niggled at him that he couldn't figured out what it was. He caught the tail end of Fred's fading smile as the older man fished out another cigar from the front pocket of his overalls and began nibbling on its end. Fred patted his pockets and met Duo's narrowed violets. "I wasn't going to smoke in the car sweetheart." Fred said, his voice full of mirth as he slipped outside the car and out of the crumpled newspaper's reach.

"Tamara, who else?" He said firmly and Tamara's pigtail peeked out from under a navy blue tarp.

"Emy's here."

"No, I'm not."

"But we only came 'cuz you can't leave without Lanely." Tamara mumbled before her pigtail disappeared beneath the tarp and her headless doll was held out in its place, "She missed you and said that she'd stay with you to chase away the bad dreams."

Emanuel crawled over the back seat and somehow missed the seat all together and fell on the floor.

Duo turned to the older man who snickered as he leaned on the driver's side window, "Well now we have the kids, though there is this procedure where..." He trailed off intentionally, with a wag of an eyebrow.

Duo turned away from him again to instead watch Tamara climb up on the armrest between his seat and Fred's, a smirk returning to his face when she placed the headless doll in his arms. He'd been content staring at Lanely until Tamara began wiggling in place.

"What's the matter?" he asked, his expression dopey but thoughtful.

Duo watched her glance to the left at Fred who took another puff on his cigar and stepped away further away from the door. Tamara pursed her lips in thought before nodding to herself, having come to some decision. He smirked at her when she tried to wiggle one finger in the come here gesture but ended up moving her whole hand with her finger still extended. She glanced at Fred one more time before pressing her nose to Duo's ear and covering them both with her cupped hand, "I gotta go."

Duo blinked, mauling it over in his mind what she meant when it dawned on him. "Damn-dang it," he covered quickly as Tamara kept her eyes downcast and rolled tiny lint balls from the loose strains on her corduroy overalls. "Sorry, sweets. It's not a problem really." He smiled in relief when her head rose enough that he could see her eyes, "Fred?"

"Yes, Baby?"

Duo snorted, that was another thing Fred did that annoyed him, he'd let that one go for now. "How far is the nearest gas station or store with a restroom?"

"Why?" A peculiar glint in Fred's eye had Duo waving him away, muttering forget it and taking Tamara out to a thicket nearby. He was surprised that Tamara handled using the bushes better than most people he had known, or at least he could remember. He took Emy next and heard Tamara squeal and whine upon his return. A divot formed between his eyebrows when he made his way around the front of the car with Emanuel holding his hand with both of his. He watched Fred throw something and the jumping girl fly after it.

"What are you doing?" He asked, with a lopsided smirk.

Fred turned to him with a huge smile, "Playing fetch."

Tamara returned with the doll clutched to her chest, a brilliant peel of laughter threatening to spill out from behind her smiling lips as she watched Fred in anticipation.

"What?" Fred queried, flicking the remaining bud of his cigar off into the street, "It keeps her busy."

"She's not a dog."

Fred snatched the headless doll out of Tamara's arms, shook it before her face and threw it. They both watched as both Emanuel and Tamara ran after it. Mocha eyes gazed smugly back at Duo, "You could've fooled me."

"And you expect to father children?" Fred grinned at him and Duo snorted with a flush spreading across his cheeks. 'The guy seemed easy enough to read,' he grumbled to himself and he made it a point to ignore the older man's piercing gaze. Duo stooped down and caught both Emanuel and Tamara when they came running back to them, wincing when he fell to his left knee.

"Drew." Duo felt the small hands on his and he eased his grip on the two stowaways in front of him.

''See Lanely was right. You can't go. You should stay with me 'cuz 'cuz we can be a family." The last came out as a mutter as Tamara pouted and gripped her doll in both hands.

Duo smiled apologetically, favoring his side when he tried to stand back up. 'I guess I forgot my cane.' He grimaced, 'I sound like an old man saying that.' He smiled at the two staring at him with concern, messing Emy's hair when he hugged him around his neck.

"It's D-" he thought about, hesitating for a reason he couldn't place, "Call me Duo and it's ok. We have to get you guys back. I'm sure they're going crazy looking for you."

Tamara shook her head fiercely, opening her mouth to speak but clamping it shut. She hugged Lanely to her chest as she looked down at the ground. Duo started to reach for her when Emy shifted, letting his arms hang loosely around Duo's neck. He dropped his head so that his chin rested on his chest and his hair swept down toward his face but Duo could still see his defeated pout.

He sighed, it wasn't like he really wanted to go back there. 'Maybe I can hide in the back seat and... oh.' Duo's back stiffened as the older man came up behind him. He really hadn't forgotten him, not really.

"I told you I wasn't going back."

Duo swallowed at the hard tone from the usually flirtatious man, "I know, but they can't go with us." 'Right, using 'us' might help a bit though there isn't. If it'll get him not to be so single-minded.' He smiled and half turned away when the teen's face from earlier flashed in his mind.

"Then we can leave them here." Fred snorted, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Fuck no." Pain forgotten for the moment, Duo rose to his feet to face him and Emy dropped his arms as he and Tamara watched the two of them.

Duo glared at Fred and held it in the face of the older man's tight expression.

Fred looked him over, thinking and caught sight of the pouting, kicked puppy-like faces the two stowaways were making behind Duo. He stretched and turned away from them, "I'm immune to that you little runts."

Tamara and Emy gave each other curious glances and Duo's rigid stance became lax at the humbled gruffness of Fred's voice, his hand drifting to his left hip.

Fred turned to them and smiled, "We'll go."

Duo smiled and gasped when the older man was suddenly in his face, his lips a breath away from his. He stared into Fred's mocha colored eyes, trying to keep his surprise from showing. Fred smirked at him before rubbing his coarse cheek against Duo's smooth one, his lips stopping at his ear, "On the condition that you stay with me."

"Wait-" Duo blushed not sure why he was but cursing his hip when it locked up on him as Fred moved away.

"Come on runts, back in the car." Fred swooped in on the two stowaways who were talking in loud whispers trying to be secretive but failing. They both squealed when they were heft over his shoulders and laughed helplessly as he put them in the back seats.

oooOoooOoooOooo

What had he gotten himself into? He really didn't know, but this wasn't L2 and though the guy royally freaked him out with the whole homestead and advanced planning thing, what he'd heard in the man was more loneliness than anything. He saw Emy waving to him and pulling Fred a long with him beyond the hearth. He waved once, his eyes locked with Tamara's who held his gaze with a stubborn pout fixed on her face before she was pulled past the hearth. He looked curiously at the dash, he'd been so lost in thought that the forty minutes it took to get back to the Inn slipped past him. 'Shit.'

"Shit!" he muttered the expletive through gritted teeth as he rubbed the top of his head where it had hit the roof of the car. He squinted out one tear filled eye at the cause of his start, Tamara came up between the seats using his arm as leverage to get up fully on the armrest and latched on to his arm with her other one once she considered herself stable enough.

"Tamara."

"No."

"You just left."

"No, that was ten minutes ago." Tamara's nose scrunched up to match her slowly pouty lips.

Duo's hand dropped to his lap. He glanced at the dash and saw that it had been that long. 'I must've dozed,' he figured, trying to loosen her fingers from his arm. A twinge of pain from his side made him grimace and he tried again to get his arm back that Tamara didn't seem ready to relinquish, "Tamara. Come on, you can't stay here with me."

"Yes, I can."

"Tamara, you got family-"

"No, I don't," came her muffled retort as she shook her head vigorously against his arm. "You're my alien. I only have you." The last part was much quieter as she glanced at Lanely in Duo's lap.

Taken aback, Duo turned to her, shifting in his seat to ease the pressure on his left side. Big teary brown eyes stared back at him, imploring that he reconsider. He looked her over half wanting to say yes but he knew better. What could he offer her that a good foster home couldn't? Solo would've been quick to answer that. He closed his eyes; Tamara had always struck a cord in him. He thought back and wondered if he had the same look when Father Maxwell and Sister Helen consoled him after the third, then the seventh family passed him over for someone younger, someone quieter, someone less wild, someone not him.

Though he seriously doubted that Tamara would have the same problems.

'Why's everyone so lonely?' He wanted to know what he'd missed but he wouldn't go back to that other boy. He'd get a book or a newspaper but he wouldn't go to him. From what he could tell about himself, he was 16 or 17 and like Fred had said, he could be easily mistaken as younger than that. Even though he had his memories up until he got on Howard's ship, he still couldn't remember much after that.

No, he wasn't being honest with himself. There was Heero. Pieces of memory of Heero bleeding, glaring, and smiling. He chuckled to himself, his hand splaying over his face as Tamara rubbed her face into his arm with a sniffle. Her small arms wrapping around his as she pulled it closer to her body. He heard the rear door open and felt her stiffen against him.

The silence was too much. 'What's Fred doing?' He wondered, though he hadn't even noticed when the older man had left with them the first time.

"Who are you?" Duo's brows bunched together at Tamara's question, alert though not too worried because her tone was more curious than frighten. He knew that if it was Heero he would've heard traces of that in her voice. Duo froze when he found Heero staring at him through the driver's side window.

In those minutes, there was a quiet exchange between Tamara and the other person before he turned to see a blonde boy smiling gently at Tamara then shift his blue-green gaze to him. They stared at each other for along moment, the blonde's smile growing to blinding proportions as Duo felt his own traitorous lips start to do the same.

Duo swallowed, his eyes jerking back to the brooding dark haired teen that hadn't moved from where he stood.

"Heero," he said in a thick whisper. He watched with a crooked smile when Heero's eyes became slightly round, his distinctive look of surprise, before narrowing as if he wanted to turn away and hide the shyness he seldom showed anyone so openly. Though it could've been shock? At this particular moment he'd bet it was a bit of both while his heart did its damnedest to beat its way out his throat, when he noticed the faint glint in Heero's eyes.

'Heero Yuy never cried.' Duo gasped as he was assaulted by memories, his pulse quickening when he put too much weight on his left side. "No," he whimpered and the blonde teen paled, swaying at the door.

"No," Duo leaned over and slammed the back door, ignoring the blonde's startled gasp even as somewhere in his mind the blonde teen's name surfaced over the sea of memories. ''Sorry Quat," he whispered to himself as the throb in his head returned full force and he slammed his hand down on the auto lock button before either of the stunned teens could get to them.

''D-Duo," Tamara's trembling voice had him hesitating as he climbed into the driver's seat.

''It's ok. It's alright, we'll leave." He refused to look at the shaggy haired teen in the driver's window as he quietly thanked Fred for leaving the car running and stepped on the gas. He was running on instinct again and wasn't sure if he knew how to drive. He didn't notice as his hands moved knowingly to the clutch. He didn't want to think about the past, he didn't want to remember. He heard Tamara scream and felt the car lurch before his head connected with the steering wheel.

tbc


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimers: I garner no profit from this fic. I don't own nor did I create the GW universe, I'm simply letting my imagination have its wicked way with the characters therein.

Warnings: Angst, AU, Duo torture, language

Pairings: 1+2, 1+R, 3+4, 5xS, eventual 1x2, 3x4

AN: Long awaited update, and a lengthy one at that.

Feedback is appreciated.

Wasurenai yo

by priscel

Nine

"Really, it wasn't a problem Bishop. You should keep a leash on the girl though," He left the den with a final nod to its occupants, his humorous tone not missed by them though he'd been serious.

"Perhaps, a muzzle too." He mumbled starting toward his room remembering Tamara nonstop yammering of 'I want Duo' before he blew, irately, up at the hair currently dangling in his face. He brushed it back and chuckled at the thought of moosing up his hair again. He shook his head, his feet moving to the left away from his room and out toward the pool, he doubted Duo would notice something like that. He fiddled with his bangs as he past the Doctor's open door, his steps slowing to a stop.

He had forgotten the Doctor's room was so close to the exit and his own. Though the older man was rarely there and it was odd that the usually private man had left his door open even if it was cracked. He was tempted just to leave it, and not be bothered. He smiled to himself, his amusement growing over his eagerness to runaway with the teen waiting in his car and how his original reasons flew out the window when heard him laugh. He'd make this work even if he was taking advantage... a little.

"Fred," he almost cursed, turning to the dark skinned man who exited the Doctor's room.

"Yea?" Hey pasted on a smile quickly replacing the one that fell. He noticed the slight quiver in his hands and had to resist the sudden urge fiddle with his hair. He wished he'd finished the whole cigar earlier. Although his smile became real at the thought of having someone to go back to, having someone waiting for him. Shit... He'd never been so out of sorts before. Not since-

"You're leaving?"

He nodded, not seeing where the older man was going but glad for the distraction from the meandering thoughts inside his head.

"Tell the Kid he should at least give us a proper goodbye." Hank half grumbled while crossing his arms over his chest in a lax manner even though his straight back posture told Fred more than enough. Fred let his smile grow, of course Hank would know who comes and goes through there as well what Duo's options were.

He was a cop after all, that was something he never let slip his mind. "I think he already did. You guys would make it harder for him to go even if you weren't trying."

"Yea, well," Hank paused looking sheepish, "he just kinda grows on ya I suppose. We have our own problems here." He cocked his head back to the door he'd left open and Fred brows raised in question knowing Hank was studying him, watching for some telltale reaction that'd give him away. At his clueless look, Hank just shook his head, his expression becoming thoughtful and concerned. "The Preventers are back again, some special group, investigating and obviously looking for someone. I would've taken him out of here myself but I'll leave you to it."

Before Fred could ask what had happen, Hank had stooped down to his level, his voice a whisper even though they were the only ones in the hallway, "Just so we have an understanding, he knows how to get in touch with me and if he tells me anything I don't like, you won't be able to hide."

Fred's lips twitched at the corners, his smile becoming a flash of a displeased grimace before settling into a tight one as he stepped back with an uncomfortable shrug. "Yea, yea. I got you..."

It was funny how much a person's background didn't fit their appearance but Hank didn't seem the type to accept people at face value. Fred was positive, that just like he'd checked the Doctor, Hank had tried to find any connections he had to the war and found nothing because the legal loophole of being seventeen at the end of the war. That legal lolly sealed his records from overly curious cops and any other enquiring minds. He laughed lightly, letting go of his apprehension, the doctor wouldn't remember him out of all the other students that he'd given physicals to or had been pushed through the Lake Victoria Academy. If the doctor tried to tie him to anything there was no proof but there would be questions if the old man decided to tell them about how he'd found him and Duo all cut up in the hall that time. Fred tried to peek around, putting in as much effort as any other person would and allowed Hank to easily block his view.

"Why are you still standing there? Get going."

He blinked at the half shove then shooing motion and thought it comical of a man Hank's size. If there was anyone that the Preventers would want to detain it would be him. He chuckled at the irony, "I'm going."

He was out the door and approaching the second hearth, where all their vehicles were parked on an elevated circular square- plateau since the last heavy downpour just when he heard the gas being pressed and a muffled girl's scream.

"Chyort poberi!" He cursed under his breath and thought the phrase described this situation perfectly as he ran to his car. There was no reason as far as he was concerned for Duo to floor it, unless he didn't know how to drive or he was trying to get away from something.

'And there's this thing with the clutch...' He shook his head when he realized what must have happened and nearly stumbled over two people on the ground in the process. He side stepped them and got a scowl in response as the brunette tried to calm the jerking motions of the blonde boy across his lap. He ignored them, half running and hoping the damage to his car wasn't as bad as the smoke suggested.

"Damn, he flooded the engine," he confirmed though the diagnosis didn't put Duo at fault, Fred's tense and knowing tone spoke more of his own. He examined the back before slapping his hand across it. His eyes flicked up to see through his tinted window when he felt a thump cause his car to shift beneath his hand.

He coughed, common sense evading him as he peered through smoke and tried to see nearly pressing his face to the glass. He arched a brown brow at the two pigtails that were the source of the movement. He saw Tamara get up and cling to the back of the drivers' seat as if she was afraid she'd fall again. He made his way over to the driver's side and found Duo slumped over on his right side in front of the stick shift. After trying the door on the driver's side and finding it locked, he banged on the passenger side door and then jiggled the handle. It never locked all that well in the first place and he was pleased that slacking off to fix it, as he had with other things, had proven to be useful.

"Duo?" He half climbed in, his hand resting on Duo's head, moving Duo's long bangs from closed eyes. The scar on Duo's right brow was becoming a large dark bruise against his pale skin with a new cut bleeding near his eye. He couldn't tell if he was hurt anywhere else from this angle.

Fred sat partially on the seat, one leg folded beneath him and reached for the bare bones first aid kit he always carried in his glove compartment. His hand closed on the plastic box. He smiled, looking fondly down at the banged up cover when the muscles in his back stiffened and he knew there was someone behind him. He felt the pressure on his arm just before he was yanked like a rag doll out of his car. He grunted, able to counter the pull-half toss thanks to his trained reflexes making it so he stumbled instead of hitting the ground as his attacker had intended. Fred glared at the messy haired man, who was the epitome of a brick wall daring something to hit it and test its solidity.

'Boy,' he corrected himself, but who was he kidding a brow inching up into the freefall of his bleached hair. He sized the boy up, flexing his shoulder and kept the frown from his face at the painful twinge he found coupled with a sting from the impression of fingerprints he was sure would be bruises by tomorrow and he wasn't one who bruised easily.

For a second, he entertained the thought of losing to him but only if it meant he wouldn't be beaten and left for dead at the end of it. He dismissed his libido, hardasses like him often warmed his bed then left in the morning - or ended up dead... and he'd had enough of that.

"Who- never mind that, just move out of the way," he demanded staring at the open passenger side door and the pale hand that twitched at his raised voice.

The sour looking boy must've seen his eye movement because he half turned to Duo, hesitant but distracted enough to partially turn his back on him. Fred started to smirk but it fell at the depth of compassion that replaced the cold expression on the boy's face. Fred gritted his teeth, 'this must be Yuy.'

'Heero,' he thought and recalled the many times he'd heard the name muttered by Duo in his sleep. It angered and compelled him at the same time as he stood frozenly with a dopey expression on his face. What he would give for that... but who had he'd been kidding to begin with? What had he been expecting?

It sure wasn't this. He felt a familiar calm enshrouding him. He couldn't find it in himself to resist it. A smile, the malicious echo of a time he'd been willing to forget, spread across his face. He felt it attempt to swallow up everything that was him. It reminded him of how easy it was to kill someone to get them out of the way. His smile became feral as he reached into the open space between his shirt and overalls then back. His fingers brushed intimately over the handle, warmed by his body heat and slick with his perspiration.

He gripped the handle of the sheathed knife that rested in an angle to the curve of his back and a calm breath slipped easily through the slight part of his lips. A dependable lover made of four inches of serrated steel that had never failed him; would never leave him. He glanced over his shoulder and found the blonde boy fumbling to find his feet, blood still running from his nose even though his hand was pressed against it. He found himself frowning again and then mentally shook it off, remembering a fragile looking countenance didn't mean a thing.

If Duo had done that to the boy then he wondered why the other one would be reacting like a watchdog. Fred pressed the flat of the blade against his lower lip, dismissing the blonde for the moment for the foolish brunette who had fully turned his back to him. Fred let his arm down slowly and drew the blade up against the inside of his arm, the black handled bottom showing through the fisted circle of his thumb and index finger. He could feel the adrenaline pumping through his veins. He could already feel the piercing the boy's flesh, see the blood as he walked up on the preoccupied teen arguing quietly with Duo.

"Stop it! Leave 'im alone." Fred watched dispassionately as Tamara, her arms decorated in a few scraps and her elbows looking rubbed raw, pulled on Heero's hair. He smirked as said teen batted her hands away with no more concern than one would have for a fly. Heero's back exposed and he remembered his little chat with Duo in his bed.

Fred's brows lowered, his grip on the blade going slack when he thought he heard something. He shouldered the dismayed teen to the side and ignored Heero's surprised sound as a whisper caught his ear.

"Say that again." He willed it, pulling himself out of that cold place even if he heard wrong. Heero grunted his disapproval but Fred didn't care much for him, slipping his knife back into its sheath instead of into the boy's back right where one kidney sat. Fred ignored him completely when he saw Duo push the silent teens' hands away.

Squinting dark blue-violets focused on him and Fred wondered if he had really heard his name or if the teen had mistaken him for someone else. Though Duo's gaze was muted in pain, he couldn't accept what his heart was hoping for... How could he? Duo would get his memories back and then he wouldn't want-

"'red..."

'Not 'Ced' or Cedric...' He shook off his daze, a goofy half smirk replaced the odd emotion he was beginning to think only Duo incited in him. "Yea, sorry Hon'. I would've been the first you laid those beautiful eyes on if the _stiff _hadn't tried to bury me a moment ago."

But living for now wasn't that bad. He shrugged mentally, there was no doubt about what he was doing, the choice he was making. He'd fallen and he wanted to see where it would take him.

"Don't 'all 'e that." Fred's smirk became a full smile, the last vestiges of what he'd been and what he was about to do pushed aside by that warm familiarity in Duo's voice. Fred placed both hands on Heero's shoulders, prepared to put some force into moving the boy when he flinched beneath his touch, moved wordlessly on his own accord. Fred gave him a curious glance, then climbed in and saw Duo lay his head back down with a painful moan and heavy breaths.

"Oh baby, if only you'd do that in bed," he teased, not surprised to hear Heero's feet stop mid shuffle. He winked at the girl's confused and blushing face, "When you're older malishka."

He was tempted to turn around and gloat but he couldn't tear his eyes away from Duo's shoulder moving in silent laughter before he groaned again. Fred's eyes glanced over on their own volition and found the gloomy brunette with the blonde who looked close to tears. He smirked, but he wasn't going to get his attention again and lord it over him who Duo chose. Not to say the temptation wasn't there. If you asked him, the guy's having a very fortunate day.

"Very..." Fred squinted, noticing the brunette pressing a white cloth to the other boy's nose. "Gauze..." then it occurred to him the stiff had pilfered it from his kit. His lips went into a tight line, he didn't have anything else and was tempted go cut him just for the hell of it. "Make him bleed a little," he muttered shucking the old papers in his glove compartment around until he found a few packs of 4x4 gauze. He tore off his shirt sleeve, his blade shifting against his back, reminding he'd a reason for putting it away and that didn't need it.

"'orry." Duo mumbled trying to get up and Fred helped him, letting him pillow his head against his knees. He noticed how Duo had calmed considerably if the slowing pulse beneath his fingers meant anything good.

"What for?" He doused his sleeve in antiseptic, tore it into manageable strips and began cleaning Duo's forehead. "It's not like you broke something, like my car for instance." Fred felt his smirk returning as he finished up, shifted the clutch and put station wagon on park to be on the safe side. He eased Duo's shirt over his head, noticing how the turtle neck stuck in some places.

Duo shifted in the quiet as Fred wiped his back and left it bare to open air. Fred squeezed Duo's shoulder when he continued to move not missing him hiss each time. "I'm no doctor but it's probably best if you don't wiggle around so much... You might just tempt me to forget you're injured." He said with a smile that wilted as Duo's started to close. "Hey, I perform best with you in attendance. Don't be sleeping and leaving me to do all the work."

Duo had one eye barely open and gave him a pained smirk.

Fred exhaled heavily, the rising panic he hadn't noticed before at the thought of Duo slipping away in his sleep made itself known. He pushed it down, ran a hand through his hair and tugged at the dyed strands in agitation.

_When had this plan gone to hell... _ But he already had an answer to that.

Fred checked Duo's eyes; both blue-violet orbs were unevenly dilated. "Listen, I gotta get you to a doctor."

"No."

"Duo! I can't treat this, if I could I'd take you on to some place with good supplies but I'm not and Cedric's no good to anyone right now." Fred ignored Duo's look of surprise, he knew why the pilot was running now and not sooner. "When he wakes up, he doesn't need to know he's lost another brother."

Duo winced and nodded once before slumping in the seat.

"Don't go to sleep." Fred told him firmly and watched Duo for a few minutes, but he stayed away.

Fred started to walk away and then cursed under his breath - Tamara sat through all he'd said and stared at him with big glistening brown eyes. "Kid - Malishka, talk to him and scream at him if you have to, just make sure he doesn't go to sleep. Call my name the moment he does."

Tamara sat up straighter and nodded, rubbing at her eyes and sniffing when snot streaked from her nose. Fred grimaced and turned away to get help. He walked passed the brunette with a mutual nod of understanding, dashed back into the Inn.

Tbc..

Note: I lost the thread to this one awhile back, bits and pieces trickling through. There's one more chapter to this so cross your fingers. ^_^'


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